Greetings! It is 5am here in Michigan, also wickedly cold. My marriage has struggled and my husband has ptsd and is a war refugee and he lives to fight with me about everything. 

Couple months ago a celebrity liked some stuff on my FB page. It was a person who used a photo, not him. It was flattering to get attention from "maybe it IS him!" And i made some comment on his real page. Suddenly i had dozens of trolls pretending to be this celebrity messaging and sending friend requests and then this celebrity was liking all the stuff i posted, which was a head scratcher for my usual circle.

I kinda went down the rabbit hole, thinking one might be him for real. I connected to one and his name was spelled right, and a check mark on his FB account, and even email was his name. His phone number was out of CA. I really thought omg i am talking to this man i have always admired and could see myself with. Every other troll wanted money and nudes and bank info but this one was so sweet. He said he loved me, we are gonna get married, that i don't have to worry about the dumpster fire that is my life as we would be together.

This celebrity is very well known. I am late 40s and he is a movie star older than I.

On the surface it sounds so idiotic, especially if you knew who. He is not a man one would think can spare the time to chat up random women.

So of course i fell into this fantasy, he was always sweet and asking about my life, talking about our future life together. Things got a little "adult" in later night chats, and suddenly i am like a teenager and think about him all day. Weeks pass, i tell him my ideas for films i want to write, working out, cutting sugar.. Falling into this fantasy that my life is about to change.

Obviously living with another man, this is fucked. I get seething hostility from my real life husband. My brother just died a few months ago and he lived here. My dad is in failing health and back in hospital. My son has been sick and out of school too long now. My life is falling apart. I hold onto this fantasy because i always thought i belonged in CA, in that industry. I always thought i would have a truly great love, and now i am closer to 50 and realizing none of that will happen. 

It lit a fire under me of what i feel like when i am really into a man. I remember what it feels like to be happy again.

Then the other shoe drops.

Of course after weeks of assurances and bonding to this man, he is all "contact my management" to set up a meet w me. 

I knew that was the ask. Of course it leads to wanting $570 in Bitcoin to get a permit or some shit. I have been fawning over this person, let them in. 

It was all a lie. He was in it for the long con i guess. He had me going that i could move, that i will meet the people to open doors, that our wedding would be so special.

I have never cared about being a diva bride. I had a court house wedding where i was pregnant, cried myself to sleep alone, he played video games w a friend. Not exactly hot.

I just don't understand how this person could be like that... Truly offer all the things i dream of, to be in love again, to believe in my future, to change my life, and it was just some predatory thing exploiting a clearly unhappy person who only knows struggle. I can't put myself back together.

Then the news came out about a date the real guy was on a few days ago. I guess he has been seeing this beautiful singer 3 minutes from his home. Obviously that makes more sense. 

I should not be this upset over a thing that wasn't real in first place. I gave myself this delusion.