Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

13,010 Members

100,360 Posts

1 Online

gbee33 09/13/2017

So my ex texted me this and I'm really scared now cuz we hung out about 2 weeks ago and it went so welll and everything and we were like we are gonna try this and everything! Then a few days later he starts to ignore me and then I sent him a text yesterday and finally got him talking and he sent me this "Sorry I just got out of class. I appreciate you telling me that. I just think we both need more space for a bit. I don't wanna hold you back from finding happiness in life and I really feel like that's what I'm doing when we talk a lot. That is not my intention at all. I love being friends but the thought that you could miss out on a chance to find your soulmate because your too caught up in me scares me. I care a lot about you and that's why I think it would be best for you if we kept some space" so I'm not sure what this means now and I'm very hurt and afriaid and he is like my only real friend and I love him sooo much I would do anything to be with him again I'm so scared and upset! Can someone pleAse tell me what it means???

FindingMywayy 09/13/2017

I don't know your situation other then reading what you just wrote but, I believe he is politely saying you should move on with your life. Him wanting space means just that. He needs space. He says you two talk alot. It seems he doesn't want you getting confused into thinking you two are going to get back together. This is why he says he doesn't want to hold you back from meeting someone else. I believe it scares him and probably makes him feel guilty that you clearly still have feelings for him that he might not have for you, even though he cares for you. My advice would be to give him the space he is asking for and see what happens from there. Best of luck.

strongandsilent 09/13/2017

Yes. He is saying he is not interested in a romantic relationship. And, he is right. You won't be able to move in while you see him. "No contact" is the only way to get over heart break.

He is acting like a decent person. Be thankful. And, take the space - not for his benefit but for your own.

gbee33 09/14/2017

Thanks it's just really hard cuz I'm so in love with him and would do anything to get him back I don't want to loose him forever! He's really like my only real friend and I miss him and need him

gbee33 09/14/2017

What does everyone think if in a few weeks I text him his " Hey I just wanna be friends and I know that's all we can be. I hope your doing well! and if it makes you feel any better I'm back on the dating sites again so I guess will see what happens...." (but I won't really sign myself up on the sites yet just to see what his answer is like if he's like I'm so glad! Then I know to sign my self up again) what do you guys think?

Songbird2582 09/14/2017

I am sorry you are hurting. Been there more times than I care to count. However, I think you have it backwards. DO join a dating site or two. DON'T text him.

I am going to assume you are fairly young. Now is the time you are developing your habits regarding relationships. If you get in the habit of fixating on someone who isn't available to you, for whatever reason, that behavior will bring you nothing but repeated heartache. And the more entrenched that habit becomes, the harder it will be to break. If you want to message me, feel free.

strongandsilent 09/14/2017

Do not text him. Ever. No contact.

3 weeks is a blink of the eye. If you are even thinking about doing this, you will spend the next three weeks thinking about texting him and what his response might be.

That is, you will continue to reinforce your habit of thinking of him. Decide now that you are no contact. Make the decision - and hold to it.

The whole process hurts. But I promise you, the journey will be shorter and less painful if you make a clear resolution to go no contact and stick to it!!

Join the Conversation