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can he do this?

pinkrose28
pinkrose28
So my ex and I have broken up for some time, but I have officially stopped spending time with him for the last few weeks. We weren't married but we did have a joint bank account together. We traveled a lot, went on a lot of vacations and anything we did or wanted to plan to do we usually used money from this account. We both would randomly add money to it. This made it easier if he was buying us both airline tickets or booking a vacation, going out to eat etc.

I have recently learned he is on a dating website and I literally felt sick looking at that profile. I don't want him to have the ability to use any money from this account anymore. I wanted to close the account and just send him half of it but he told me I cant do this without him being present and that I would have to wait until HE HAD TIME to do so. I know him well enough to know he will drag it out and do it when he feels like it. I just want nothing to do with him anymore. To be honest I want to forget everything about him. Maybe I am just very angry but each day that goes on its another unresolved day.

What are the rules on closing an account? if he wont show up to do it what are my options? I literally go online and look at the balance daily to make sure not a penny has been taken. To be honest I don't even feel it is actually about the money, but more so who he is taking out and the anger from that is what is making me feel that way.
lookingforclosure
lookingforclosure
Call your bank and ask. I just talked to my bank earlier this week, wanting to just take my name off of the joint account. They told me to just send a letter saying I wanted to close it, and give an address where they could send a check with what's remaining. I was kind of surprised by that. Might just be that particular bank, and the fact that I was obviously the only one putting money into it, but they told me they didn't need anything from the STBXW, just a letter from one of us.
loverofstories
loverofstories
Not sure about whether the bank will require you both to be there - couldn't you just go into the bank though, withdraw your half of the money and ask them to remove your name from the account? Then he will be responsible for getting his money and closing the account (which will then be in his name only) at that point.
murphytoronto
murphytoronto
Yes, you both must sign off on it....but maybe you could separately
I still have several joint accounts....but just do not use them
sja
sja
I would definitely call the bank on this. When I divorced, I kept the checking account to pay the mortgage until we sold our house, and once it was sold I was able to just close the account out and my ex didn't have to be there at all, and his name was still on the account. We had agreed on this, but I didn't need his permission for the bank to do it, I just went in, withdrew the money and signed the papers to close it. My bank is Citizens, BTW, not sure who you use.

If you can't do that, I like the suggestion of withdrawing half the money and asking if your name can be taken off the account.
ChiTownBear
ChiTownBear
Most times, when you have a joint account for anything, both have to be partied to closing it our just as much as both are parties to maintaining it.

The only exception may be if you are the primary account holder and he is just an add-on, or whatever the technical term is. If this is the case, you may have the option to remove him from the account or disable his access.

Outside of doing things legitimately, you can take out whatever money you think is yours, and leave the account alone and let him have the rest. But make sure, if you leave it, that you are taken off as soon as possible so not to incur any issues if he decides to go overdrawn or whatnot on the account.
Missy73
Missy73
You need to contact the bank. I recently wanted to close a joint account with my husband and that bank only required one of us to come in and close it. I once closed a joint account with someone else and the bank required both of us to be present.
gem111
gem111
just withdraw 1/2 the money and take your name off the account leaving it in his name.
The bank should be able to do that much. If nothing else, get the money or sure as heck it will disappear.
loosingthebattle
loosingthebattle
He went in ASAP to get papers from both our different banks to take him off my chkg and me off his, we both had to sign. He was able to take my name off of credit card account that he primarily used. I am unable to take him off mine. I have to open a new one. I can't change or take him off as beneficiary of any retirement accounts as they ask if I'm married. He added internet service to his new house, added to old bill which is mine and after pointing out to him that the entire bill is being charged to me in February, he still hasn't changed that. Which we are...I'm finding it very frustrating. But after 25 years.
Don't want to mess with my credit score by doing so much opening and closing of credit accounts at one time.
Atpeacemary
Atpeacemary
If it is in both names, just take precisely half out and leave him the rest. Telling the bank why you are doing that. You are entitled to half. And he cannot say or do a thing about it. He sounds like a controlling jerk. Hugs, I know it hurts, but it is better that you find out now, then later.
MrCellophane
MrCellophane
I don't see a need to close the account. Just take out half the money. Or more. Then he'll have to jump through hoops to get his part back! If it's a true joint account, you each own 100% of the entire balance. You could probably take it all out and there wouldn't be much that he can do to stop you.
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