I'm so sorry for your pain. First, you have two children that need you and love you. Second, he hasn't said it's over for sure and has agreed to go to counseling. Third, I'm not going to tell you it's easy or that you shouldn't hurt--but, many of us have been where you are and have survived. I'm glad you found us. We understand.

thank you for your encouragement. i know it's going to take time, effort and understanding; it's just I have never felt this much pain before. I cannot see myself without him, and for some reason, hopefully i;m wrong, i think it may truly be over. he had warned me over & over how he needs to feel attention, and love. and for some reason i can tell other people how i feel but not him. he is the nicest guy in the world and I feel like i blew it. Right now while i'm wollowing in my self pity, he has taking the kids to school, taking them to dance, telling me to get some rest. when he comes back from dance he would could us supper if i want him too before he goes back to a hotel. what kind of person am I to loose and push this man to his limit. what kind of person does this. its all on me. the pain i feel is so unbearable. i just want it to go away and i want to make sure he doesn't come back to me because he feels sorry for me. I just can't stop feeling numb. i hate my life, i hate what i did to him, and i regret putting my children through this. thank you for letting me vent.

I am not sure of all the details of your story, but it sure sounds like you are taking a bulk of responsibility for this split. What did you do that was so bad it was too unlivable for him? You said he mentioned over and over he needed more attention and love from you. what exactly does that mean?

I am sorry you are hurting and where you are right now. You have come to a very good place those for understanding and support.

while it may seem overwhelming right now, just remember to breathe, try to eat, be patient and deal with each emotion, thought and instance as they occur.

*hug*

I am so sorry. Please know you will get thought this.

Hang in there. Breathe. Eat some crackers or something small.

The good news is that he has offered to go to counseling. All is not lost if he is willing to try some more. Make that counseling appointment as soon as you can. Call now if you think they might still be open.

Just breathe and know you can talk to us.

Edit: Please know you will get *through* this.

He is willing to try counseling, that is a good thing. Take a deep breath and hang in there so you can function to work on the situation... best wishes to you...

He feels that we were more like roommates instead of husband & wife. I never let him know I loved him anymore in little ways that I use to. Kisses, hugs, we wouldn't indulge in sex anymore unless he initiated it. I made him feel like he wasn't needed. I am trying to hang in there it is so hard. Its now 6:04 I finally made myself take a shower, I called my doctor to see if she could give me a prescription so i could try to on with life. I guess this is a step. but i don't want to get a divorce, i love him so much. i don't understand how i could of let it go so far. and i'm afraid if i tell him he will only be coming back because i am begging. i am lost, confused, sad, angry and trying to go through the day to day life is unbearable.

One other thing. He is going on with his day, the kids seem to be doing what they have to do, but why can't I. I cannot motivate myself to do anything how can they do this? I don't understand it. I am so numb i am just a walking zombie.

I too am sorry you are feeling so much pain. I have felt that pain too. I honestly don't know how I lived thru some of it, but I did somehow. I think it's perfectly normal for you to be feeling what you are feeling. It's a big change..you have been together for a long time.

Just take it one day at a time and if you need to cry, then cry.

Know that you will be ok. Be gentle with yourself. Find someone to talk to about it.

im sorry for your pain. wish i could help better.. just hang on. pls try to take a deep breath & pls pray. my bf left me.. until now.. im still in pain.. he's the nicest man i know.. & thinking that he's no longer mine makes me sick :-) but we will get through this. just hang on!!
Count your blessings!! you still have your children, whom you love & loves you back.
take care of yourself

kisses

I think my kids are the only reason why I haven't done anything really stupid. I just can't believe this is happening to me, and I want him to stop trying to help me because it just makes it worse. One day at a time is a lot long.. I keep telling myself that, but dam it just HURTS so much. Thank you all for trying to help me. How do you go on, go to work or just get up out of bed.

omg you poor thing..if its for real and its ending

you have to relearn everything..i mean everything..getting out of bed in the morning..i couldnt eat anything for over 3 months..i lived on carnation breakfast

you've come to the right place..we've all been there done that.

mine walked out on me after 33 yrs on xmas eve 07

you can and will do this but i will be the hardest thing you can ever imagine dealing with

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_rC_tH6_AZQ

To msmsde, i just don't understand 33 years of marriage and he just lets it go!!!!!! did he cheat, give you any signs. I just don't understand you build a future and live with someone for so long how does this happen. i dont get it. by the way i love you cat really cute. wish i was him right now, he looks like he is loving life.

msmde's cat does look like he's loving life. hah!
There you go! good sense of humor, Brandy.

Are you both at home together tonight or is he at a hotel now? Take your time, but be careful not to push your husband away if he wants to communicate or help you. Alienating him won't help. Even a hug mean the world if its all you can muster.

yes he cheated..and thru the divorce i found out quite often

how do you do it? you have kids..you have no option and i cant tell you how many times i thought about ending it.

just keep posting here, we'll help you thru it