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Attended therapy

Rman
Rman
Well, I finally took my daughter to therapy today. Although she basically buried her head in my chest the whole time, I feel that I have a few tools to use going forward. I must pick and choose my battles. I must give her the opportunity to choose whether or not she wants to behave properly and receive praise, or behave badly and face some restrictions. I now know that this is a control battle. Now I will give her control over her own consequences. Her control is deciding on how she wants this to go. I am going to write down all the struggles we have this week. I am going to set up a rewards system. I am going to be open to the fact that I need to learn how to improve my parenting skills. She knows that it is not only about her acting up, but rather about how we can all improve the quality of our lives. I fucked up and now I am going to make it better. Just needed to get this off my chest. Thanks for listening. I know that life is not over, but only beginning. Happy New Year!
Taco wishes to everyone!
totallychaotic247
totallychaotic247
That's great! Happy New Year!
deleted_user
deleted_user
It's funny, we have this role to play, but how often do we communicate to the children that we can't possibly have ALL the answers....that what we can do with and for them is predicated on our love for them, yes...but is still very limited all the same. Limited by what we learned as children, by the current state of the family they and we are in, and what they are or are not capable of at their level of emotional development.

I always tell me kids that I need their help in figuring things out and that I will help them figure it out too. But I always make sure they see that every action has an equal and opposite reaction.

Sounds like you are very engaged, and trying pretty damn hard to figure it all out as a team...don't underestimate her quiet recognition of you being on that team...as much as she will piss and moan about you being there. I am convinced that if a child sees you will never give up on him/her, that alone will make the difference in their life.

From one dad to another, I am proud of you.
FrankTheGreat
FrankTheGreat
Good for you, Shirley.

And happy new year.
deleted_user
deleted_user
As parents, none of us have all the answers, so good for you that you are getting help in dealing with your daughter. Sounds like the tools you are acquiring are benefiting both of you. And you are so right "life is not over, but only beginning." Big New Year hugs to you.
deleted_user
deleted_user
High Five RMan!!!!!

You Rock

This is going to be a much, much better year for you and your daughter :O))