Bisexuality Support Group

Bisexuality is a sexual orientation which refers to the aesthetic, romantic, and/or sexual attraction of individuals to other individuals of both their own and the opposite gender or sex. Most bisexuals are not equally attracted to men and women, and may even shift between states of finding either sex exclusively attractive over the course of time.

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Anyone ever experienced biphobia in the lgBtq+ com

Kiasaur
Kiasaur

Like why is the B even there? I've stopped caring about homophobia and biphobia from straight people, you just get used to some people's stupidity.


But one thing that really shocked me was the biphobia in the lgBtq+ community itself. They imply that if a bisexual woman is with a woman, she is no longer bi she's lesbian or if she's with a man she's automatically straight. It's as if no one comprehends that you can be attracted to more than one sex. People assume you're some whore or you will try to date both sexes at the same time. And people assume that if you're with a girl, you'll cheat with a guy vice-versa. Or they think that you're selfish for liking more than one sex. 


And the thing is, the logic makes no sense. That's like when homophobes think a gay man loves every guy they see and that everything said gay man is doing = flirting. Or when homophobic females try to stay away from lesbians. 


Just because we are attracted to both sexes, doesn't mean we treat love like a game or the people we love as objects.


I believe this biphobia comes from those who call themselves bi-curious after a bad break-up and happen to be straight two weeks later. Or the people who use it as an excuse to experiment. 


I have a friend in California who's bi and couldn't go to Pride without getting some weird looks and biphobic comments from people and hence stopped going to Pride and stopped believing/following the whole pride dealio. I've also noticed some other bisexuals who don't believe in it either for similar reasons.


I was wondering if anyone has also experienced this in person? lol sorry if this came off as too ranty ( it is a little tbh)



soulsearcher83
soulsearcher83
It seems hypocritical to ask for and demand tolerance without giving it. I'm sorry that happened to your friend. I don't blame them for leaving. I am bi with limited experience with women. If I came across someone who thought like that, I wouldn't waste my time on posers.
Kiasaur
Kiasaur
Yeah, it was kinda disappointing to hear that people in the lgbt+ community think that way
MrsTinkyT
MrsTinkyT
There also doesnt seem to be much support for a once straight couple who's had one party come out as bi. Everyone asumes the next natural thing is for him or her to cheat. The problem is that the hubby does want to expirament.... so its like going from being in a straight and monagomous relationship to being married to a bisexual who wants to experiment..... i to would consider myself bisexual as i have sexual attraction for women too but no desire to explor that side as i love and respect my husband too much to do that. Sorry to hijack your thread.... its not the first one.... been doing a lot of reading ....a lot of commenting.....i hope the lgbt com opens their eyes to those of us who need their support as we dont feel we fit into any community right now.... xo
art4life19
art4life19
Yes I have experienced that and many people don't understand. Gay people and straight people have somethings in common they are both only attracted to one sex. And because of that they often don't understand what it is like to be attracted to both sexes. If you are straight there is a straight community out there to support you. If you are gay there is a community out there to support you. Bisexuals have their own community in which they are truly only understood by other Bisexuals. A lot of people are into being in a serious romantic committed relationship with one person. In the Bisexual lifestyle we can be in committed relationships as well but if we are true to ourselves and the people we are involved with romantically we are the happiest when we are with partners that accept us being Bisexual and can deal with us being attracted to someone else. I think for a Bisexual person it is nice when we can be in committed relationships involving 1 man and 1 woman. I have had that and I was happy having a man and woman in my life at the same time. It was interesting because the man in my life was straight and the woman in my life was a lesbian. I had 2 lovers one of each sex and they were both content just being with me and not having another partner. Things ended with my girlfriend because she eventually just wanted to be with me and didn't want me to have a man in my life. But unlike her I wasn't a lesbian and desired to be with a man so I knew that I couldn't stay with her. We wanted different things. Alot of people think that Bisexual people are just greedy and that they should choose a side gay or straight.
Euphoria_Gnome
Euphoria_Gnome
I hate to say it, but it's really not that surprising for me. Things have been so divisive lately that it makes sense that no one can truly understand someone who's willing to "swing both ways," aside from that someone. Like you have to choose a team nowadays - you gotta have a clear, definitive label. It's stupid, in my opinion. Just let people live their lives, for Pete's sake...
RobotUnicorn
RobotUnicorn
Unfortunately, yes, such misunderstanding does exist in the LGBTQ+ community. As silly as it seems, the community can be very divided at times. I was at a pride luncheon once and there were three rows of tables. The gay men were on one side of the room, the lesbian women on the other. In the middle was "everyone else" such as the drag queens, transgender folks, and anyone else that didn't fit by sight into the tropes of one extreme or the other. It was really quite sad. That said, I had lunch with some wonderful folks including some truly awesome drag queens and one very sweet (and cute) opera singer.

I have been to events for bi/gay men where I was the only one truly out as bi and had to field a lot of stupid questions. (Yes, I am bi. Yes, my wife knows I'm here. No, I will not be hooking up. No, it has nothing to do with being married to a woman - it's because I'm married, period. Yes, again, I DO belong here, thank you.)

The most outrageous comment I ever got was, "You're just bi because you haven't met the right man." That was SOOOOOO hypocritical. It would have been like if I told that guy, "You're just gay because you never met the right woman."

Regardless of where they fall on the sexual spectrum, people can be wonderful or they can be asshats.
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