From other posts of yours that I've read, your husband doesn't seem very supportive and seems to put you down and do a real job on your self-esteem. Would he consider couple's counseling?

I understand the lack of motivation to do household chores. I'm very behind in my household work because of being overwhelmed with so many things going on and because I've been sleeping too much. I'm trying to find ways to motivate myself to get caught up around the apartment. Good luck to you.

sorry to point this out, but I have to know.....you've stated what he DOES help with, and that you haven't dont anything for 2 weeks? Look if you BOTH are busy then you should BOTH do them.....not just him, and not just you. Sorry to sound like him, but if my wife didn't do anything for 2 weeks......I think I would have to say something also

I have ran the dishwasher both week and last week I did do up all the laundry. I should have stated that. I've also cooked every day of the week because I've had to so it's not like I didn't do anything because I did. I just didn't clean the kitchen or bathroom for two weeks in a row.

Ok, I was married for 12 years to a man who thought I was his mother. The answer is get a cleaning lady/ crew. it is worth it

well, that's a far cry from NOT doing anything.....if you think the chores need to be evened out since you are both busy, then make a chore chart and put both your names on it. Tell him if he doesn't do his part to keep a clean household...then keep his mouth shut...
That's what I would do in your shoes

My mother in law does pay a cleaning lady once or twice a month to come and clean the house but the husband always bitches that she has to come clean and he complains that she is essentially doing my job. Either way he complains.

Sounds like he has bigger issues than an unclean house

He has huge codependency issues and major depression.

But he says he can only afford me to see a pdoc he says

insurance doesn't cover enough for him to get the care

that he needs so he refuses to get help.

LOL

Honestly, this is not to be rude or anything, but you've made this same post before and I am confused about what you're looking for in the responses to posts like this one. Validation that you're right to be resentful of your husband's attitudes? Shared experiences from people with unappreciative partners, or partners that are too demanding? Refutation of low-self esteem based on weight issues? A place to vent or seek sympathy? If we don't understand what you're looking/asking for, how can anyone respond with something that's going to be useful for you?

~b.

I guess maybe understanding. I just wanted to vent and have some people understand....to be validated. I know that there's probably going to be no solutions to my problems. I am just destined to be unhappy and miserable for ever and I should learn to expect that nothing in my situation is going to change.

BPP your situation will only change when your mind set does. I am not suggesting that you don't have a right to be royally peed off with your husband but only you can find the silver lining and until you do every situation is going to be miserable for you.

gonna add my 2 cents, though with me it ends up being more like 5--LOL.

I heartily agree with solongago--how is anything in your life going to be better, or more fulfilling, or healthy and healing, if all you're doing is complaining? We survive by holding onto hope and believing in the silver lining, even on the days we can't really see it. Granted, we all have bad, horrible, excruciatingly painful days, but self-pity is not helpful. A "woe is me" attitude never allows for betterment, a greater belief in self, or any type of agency--where you realise that you have to act instead of being acted on, in order to have any control over your life.

You are not "destined" for anything and giving into a defeatist attitude isn't going to get you wny further on the path to wellness and stability. You have to choose, make decisions, set a schedule--whatever, but don't blame others when you're not doing anything to change the situation and then say you're "destined" to be miserable. That's called a self-fufilling prophecy.

Someone gave the most excellent advice other day (and no I don't remember who or in what post), I think it applies applies here, and should be taken it in the spirit that it was meant. Pull on your big girl panties, and get to it.

I don't clean my house when I'm unhappy I just zone out and become a vegetable. Husband doesn't help much unless he knows and senses I'm going down. Hope you get some more assistance (help).

tell him its both ur house and both your mess its not just your job to clean