Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
Up until recently I was taking mass dosages of medication to dull my senses of whats going on around me. I have finally gotten down to around 250mg a night of seroquel compared to 800mg. I take a lot of xanax, smoke pot and have a dink nightly. My doctor wants me to move my seroquel and lithium levels back up. I think that it may be because of the medications but I have become more manic (mostly on a small level) depression (on a larger scale) and suicidal ideation, not to be mistaken with suicide attempts. I merely think about suicide and think of it as a way out, something that is another place than here. In the recent months I keep going on little trips and sty-cations to attempt to distract myself from my situation but there is no point in trying to rebuild myself if i know I am never going to feel as good.... as the same as I once was. Although I know life is never going to be the same or as it was, so I should simply try to rebuild new.
Does everyone face these type of thoughts and making plans. I don't think that I would ever actually go through with a suicide attempt, but the thoughts are still there and that is what concerns me.
Does everyone face these type of thoughts and making plans. I don't think that I would ever actually go through with a suicide attempt, but the thoughts are still there and that is what concerns me.
I think it's important for us to make our lives as good as possible, whatever that is. Things change no matter what so it's important to enjoy as much of life as possible, I think.
*huggggs* I know it's hard choice to know whether medication is helping or covering up, at that level.
On another note. I am not manic, other than kinda blacking out at night. I don't think that I am truly manic right now I definitely feel more depressed. But, I am going out with friends and spending a lot of money on stupid things like hotel rooms downtown about 5 minuets from my house. I don't know what is going on and I have worked for years to come down on medications and I don't want to start taking them all again, it makes me distorted and even more paralyzed than I am now.
Do you guys experience these same issues with making and/or keeping friends? I've seen some bipolar individuals have a lot of trouble with relationships. My family understands what I have gone through and are very sympathetic, but my friends are a different subject and I have a lot of issues with them...
alcohol is a depressant, and does not mix well with psychiatric meds. It will for sure complicate your treatment. Benzos like Xanax can make things worse as well. Depending on how much you drink and take xanax, you might benefit for a dual-diagnosis program.. even if its just outpatient. I'm not saying you are a full blown addict or anything... just that certain chemicals don't mix well, and most people need help stablizing and detoxing.
Also, don't give up hope that you can feel as good as you once did. Having BP does not mean you are cursed to never be quite as happy anymore... it just means you've hit a bump in the road. I'm 31, had BP since I was 16, and I am happier now than I have been ever.
Hang in there.
As for friends. I have very few in real life. Maybe 2 around my area, but I can't really go to them with the bipolar issues. One of them can't deal with one part of the bipolar and the other can't deal with one part of it. So I have to watch what is said and put that mask on. HUH? Not true friends are they?
My bestest is in Oklahoma. I talk to her everyday. We support each other in everything. I would be lost without her and my husband.