Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
My spouse is bipolar. He recently yelled at me and said alot of stuff that isn't true. I'm not perfect I know that , but he is wrong about everything he said & when I defend myself he says he knows he's 100%right. This is how it goes every time he yells at me , & he can't be 109% right all the time. It makes me feel like I have to record every word & action to back myself up.
I don't want to be with him anymore, but I'm afraid to bring up separation because he knows just what to say to make me feel guilty. Plus we have two adult children with autism at home & they don't do well with change. And my oldest would want to be with him , but that wouldn't be good because my spouse gripes at him for small stuff all the time, & my son defends himself,then things just go downhill from there. I think it would really get out of hand if I wasn't around to intervene.
I honestly don't know what to do. I'm considering telling him he has to do therapy to learn how to communicate without attacking me , & to figure out how to know when he is wrong about something. Things he said: I don't say I love him (I'm not perfect about it , I show it in action more . But I do say it .
I don't support him (I make all his appointments,deal with the pharmacy, keep up with everything when he's in his low periods ect. He has medicaid, snap food benefits, & a job because of me.
I don't kiss him (I do , just not as fond of French kissing anymore
He said he won't get a job outside the house because I might screw him over. I had a fling 26 years ago but haven't done anything since. We did counseling about it , but he brings it up every time he's mad at me, Even though he is the one who wanted to end couples therapy because he said we were fine ! Plus I don't have anyone to watch our disabled kids so how exactly would I even be able to screw him over again?
I'm just tired of always being the bad guy . All of this he said because I didn't feel like going in another room & cuddling with him . I was tired as hell and I shouldn't have to if I don't feel up to it !
Advice welcome, but please be kind.
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I find myself going places in the car and not wanting to get out of the car. I come back home and I don't want to get out of the car. I think it's the only time I spend reflecting. Chronic tiredness from Long Covid plus the immunosupressing meds for my Crohn's is slowing me down but everything just seems a massive effort. I am dealing with the paperwork following my father's death but it's not...
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Wow, it's the middle of the week already!Today is our 11 year anniversary, so we're going out to a nice dinner. I'm losing a lot of sleep these days, hence a wonky schedule and uncomfortable feelings. But I know it will pass, eventually.I hope all of you have a peaceful day, and may good things come your way!
There is a "Friends and Family of BiPolar's" Board on this site that might give you more appropriate advice.
Take care and good luck.
The link to Family & Friends is
https://www.dailystrength.org/group/family-friends-of-bipolar
Alternatively there is the Healthy Relationships board because my sense is that this isn't about bipolar - I've seen plenty of "normal people" make very similar posts so I think you may find more appropriate advice there.
https://www.dailystrength.org/group/healthy-relationships