Let them go and you may see that other people are letting theirs go too.All the best to you.
Forwards

yeah, too right. That's how learn what does't feel right by us too.

You don't mean things you've done when manic, do you? Truly should n't beat yourself up for such things x

Try not to be held bondage to your past .
What good does it do you any way rehashing every mistake you ever made , You can't go forward always looking back .
Like you said , put them all in the closet close the door and don't open it until all the wounds have healed .
I too have made so many mistakes , But there is not a damn thing I can do about it now .life goes on , I just try the best I can to move forward .Sometimes I wish I would get amnesia . LOL

Well said Heretic!!

If you ever find one of those "closets" let me know...I could use one, or two. :)

Take care...

I couldn't let go of things without help - of course I still have a few broken records up there, but most stuff regrets, disappointments pain - I learned tools and coping skills that worked....

You gotta try some different shit girl!!!!! (((BIG HUG))))) I know, spent a lot of time there

Some people find the DX an answer to there behavior then use the dx as an excuse for all future events.

I've always found you a sensible person here with wisdom far beyond your years. That's what we get from our mistakes. That's growth... But the hardest part of healing is forgiveness. You are allowed to forgive yourself. Allow yourself that...

I am guilty of the same thing, especially when I'm alone. I tend to get caught up in memories, rehashing things, wishing I had done things differently. There's a lot of mistakes back there. When I spend too much time looking back, I notice that it tends to affect my health in a bad way and I end up not feeling good.. So I do try not to linger on the bad and ugly for too long anymore. There's so much good and we need to pay attention to those things as much as possible.

On the internet there are several sights dedicated to the 7 Key Elements of Mindfulness. If you go to these sights, the advice there might help you stop dwelling on the past. Try it. Why not?

It all depends on my attitudes and emotions at the time whether I am beating myself up more or not.

Today I too am beating myself up constantly so I do understand and it is nice to know that I am not alone.

It is refreshing to see someone take responsibility for past mistakes and not blame their behavior on there Dx.

I really do understand where you are coming from Heretic, There are many mistakes I have made in the past that I wish I could go back and fix, most of them have to do with my children.

I think the best we can do is try to learn from them and become the people we know we should be. Forgiveness is hard, Self forgiveness is almost impossible.

Know that I have seen you try to help people and give of yourself on here many times. So you can't be all bad (LOL)
Hope you realize that was my feeble attempt at humor.
WW

I understand. I just made a biggy last Maarch and I cant get it out of my head. I want to talk about it to people bec then thosee things start getting smaller in my head but this one is sooo embarrassing I cant bring myself to tell anyone else. ):

I feel the exact same way! Things I've done while manic are things I just can't forget about. I've done some bad things and just can't seem to get over them. My family holds things against me too. It's so hard.

I struggle with the same thing all the time... I have a complex with guilt.. ugh.. It's hard to deal with..
I think I was conditioned with it as a way to control me when I was young ..
I feel for you sweetie.. It can be nasty... I wish I knew how to move on.. I can forgive anyone for pretty much anything except for myself..
Big hug of comfort for you..x

I don't beat myself up over things from the past although I did at one time. The relief from that turmoil came as I was trying to deal with issues involving my mom. She was very narcissistic and unable to show compassion or caring. I just could not fathom how a person could be that way -- especially after I became a mother and realized the impact it had on me and my life.

I came to the conclusion that my mom did the best she could with what she had to deal with emotionally, educationally, etc. My past misdeeds were me trying to do the best I could without a proper diagnosis.

Now that I've been diagnosed and have a treatment plan than can be very successful if I adhere to it, I am totally on the hook. :)

I've learned that it is A-OK to be as compassionate with myself as I naturally am with everyone else on the planet.

Thanks for your insights and support. I really wish I could turn my brain off at times. I am struggling to control my thoughts, wishing it could be easier.