Try to distract yourself and the urge will go away for a bit. Try to call your pdoc tomorrow and let him know how you are feeling. I am sorry you are depressed.

I would contact your pdoc asap and tell him your feelings.....talk to a caring professional before you cut. You have done so good by not cutting.......I would try and talk it out here and fight those urges. We care for you. You matter. Don't injure yourself. You are worth the fight!

first of all you need to ring your pdoc up and request to get back onto the dosage where you were...

secondly why in the world did he/she lower your dosage...seems silly if they already knew you are vunerable in these situations...

thirdly hold on, sit down calmly and try to distract yourself to do something else...

*hugs*

Don't do it !!!! You can fight it.Call your Pdoc office and tell them and ask what you should do. If you cannot do that find someone who can come over or that you could go to that will help you stay distracted until in the morning when you can get ahold of the Dr.You have to tell him or he cannot help.You will regret anything self harming wise you do so much it will only make things worse when you are done.

If you're contemplating suicide, please contact a hotline or something

1-800-suicide....

And remember these are temporary issues that the depression
will eventually subside. You do need to be back on your regular
amount of depression meds......I agree.

Yes odds are if you call your Pdoc and tell them they can maybe even call you in a script for your regular dose and you will not even have to go in.I would call tonight and talk to the Dr on call and see if they can help maybe call it in to an all night pharmacy maybe with something to take for the anxiety too.Then you can get started right away .If they will not do that ask them to give the note to your Dr first thing in the morning that way it is a priority. Hang in there this is temporary !!!!

IF you need the numbers instead of the letters for the suicide hotline

it is

1-800-784-2433.....

Thanks for your support guys. I think I'm going to try to just go to bed and hope things are better in the morning.

And just to clarify my pdoc lowered my dosage because even on depression meds and mood stabilizers I was still slightly higher than normal 24/7 and we were trying to fix that.

You're welcome....but do you think that being suicidal that you should be alone? Talk to us. We're here for you.

Allie ,
Take care and rest well.Jump back on if you feel weak and are tempted to harm.There are other ways they can help with the mild mania that does not include lowering your dose of anti D's so there is hope and help.Hang on and promise us you will call the Dr first thing in the morning .(that was the mama in me right there did you see that?LOL)

I don't know. I'm not really that suicidal. I'm just thinking about it, not planning on acting on it. I do still really really really want to cut though. I feel like so much pressure is building up inside me and I need to get it out. I'm scared the depression isn't going to go away this time when I get my meds back up. I can't be like this anymore. I can't do it. I can't do it, I need help. I don't want to be alone but my roommates won't understand. I just want my sleeping pills to kick in so I can be knocked out until morning. I can't deal with the world. I better be able to make it through my 9 hours work shift tomorrow. usually I like work. But right now I don't like anything. I fucking hate this. I feel it escalating and I can't fix it. Damn it I NEED TO CUT.

This is just a scenario not that you stopped taking them or anything but usually when there's less drugs in your system it will take the body a lot more drugs to attempt to get back up to baseline....But everyone's different. I am so sorry that you feel this way. If you're having suicidal thoughts maybe you should go to the ER and they could give you a temporary relief in your med situation. Hope you get to feeling better soon.

Have you been dx'd with bp? I remember you were saying you thought you were... but you weren't actually dx'd. Are you on mood stabilizers? Lowering depression meds, and increasing mood stabilizers are probably a step in the right direction if you are bp,now if you are unipolar then yea you probably need them re-upped. Do you have borderline personality disorder? A lot of them are cutters.

Oh and my old pdoc liked Lamictal for treatment resistant unipolar depression (he just used lower doses for them) and it is great for bipolar depression too - you might want to ask about it.

amlzahar...I have been diagnosed with bp.