I neeeeed to cut. Its been a year and a month but now the urge is back. Strong. I slipped into a depressiond a few days ago after my pdoc lowered my depression meds. Instead of leveling out and getting better I'm getting worse. I though about suicide tonight for the first time in a long time. And now I really need to cut. I honestly haven't decided if I am going to steadfastly fight the urge or just give in. I want the scissor blades on my skin so badly. I can't take this pent up pain and anger. I just want to say fuck it and give up on everything.
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