Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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Motivation

Penny_Varis
Penny_Varis

Hi, I'm Kailey, I've got Bipolar II, and am in the midst of one of the worst down-swings I've ever had. To be honest I don't remember a time where I wasn't feeling partially depressed, exept while having a manic episode. So I'm pretty used to living with the depression, and just forcing myself to get along despite it, but this one feels different. I have some other stuff going on that I'm sure is adding to the maelstrom in my head. I just have no motivation to do really anything anymore, worse than I've had before. It takes absolutely everything I have just to get up and take care of my dog. I've found myself just sitting at my table, staring at the wall for hours. It scares me. I'm scared that I'm going to get stuck like this, unable to even bring myself to eat anymore. I've been flirting with suicidal ideations for the past couple days, and I know I shouldn't be, but: if this is all I have to look forward to, and manic spurts that are more trouble than I care to say.. Long story short I'm kinda running out of options... I'm on lithium, and a calcium channel blocker to help with the lithium, and I've tried almost every med made for bipolar and even uni-polar depression. Any suggestions, especcially for getting basically any motivation would be really helpful.


Thanks,


Kailey

MayB
MayB
Yikes....I wish I didn't know the territory but I'm afraid I do. Depression is an exercise in self acceptance and learning to cut yourself a break. You will not accomplish much in this mindset nor will you do much to win...love yourself regardless. I know it sounds easy...:)
tommymott
tommymott
Hi. I'm a BPI and I've used lithium for many years. While it controls mania very nicely it doesn't keep me from being mildly or seriously depressed. When seriously depressed I've used an anti-depressant,
effexor, to pull me out of it. That works well except it's necessary to be aware when your mood starts to lift because an anti-depressant will put you into mania and there we go again! And when our mood starts to lift while using an anti-depressant we may find that we get the motivation to follow through with suicidal ideations and that's counter-productive, to say the least. The one thing that helped me the most with the ideations was to decide that I really wanted to live and then use negative-thought-
stopping techniques to battle-and stop the ideation. That's a simple and effective method. I recommend it. I wonder why you're diagnosed a BPII since you have a problem with mania (as opposed to hypomania) and are using lithium. That doesn't add up for me. I wish you success.
http://www.webmd.com/mental-health/positive-thinking-stopping-unwanted-thoughts
Community LeaderSunCloudJD
SunCloudJD
Big hug for you Penny..... I'm sorry that you're struggling.... I have much the same description of my diagnosis..

I am more often then not in some form of depression.... Especially when the Fall hits... It's a double whammy when we have SAD as well..... I'm not sure if this is what you're dealing with??

Are you in any sort of therapy?.... A cognitive type of therapy might help.... My pdoc believes the 'Happy Lamps' can help and believes in the science behind them

I'm glad that you're here.... Big hug.....xo
Penny_Varis
Penny_Varis
I don't have a therapist at the moment, been trying to find one in my area that is covered by my insurance. I also have some uh serious issues with CBT (my mother was a PhD student under the guy that invented CBT, and he was a complete jackass to me when I was really little.) so trying to find something other than that.
Community Leaderacuriousfish
acuriousfish
you need to discuss this with your psychiatrist.

as you are bipolar 2 you might find adding lamotrigine to the medications will help.

I'm bipolar 2 and found lithium didn't take care of my depression and was switched to lamotrigine
Penny_Varis
Penny_Varis
I've tried that particular med, it caused some pretty horrifying side-effects for me. :c
Jenniferswe
Jenniferswe
hello,
I have bipolar 2 also. It has been a long time since I have felt any joy. I have very little motivation. I think it's because I have a lot of fear.
I'm going through much of what you have described. I also take lithium.

I just wanted you to know that you are not alone. Hugs
solofighter
solofighter
Hi, I hope you are able to find some relief.
I have bipolar 2, as well as generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety and borderline personality disorder tendencies.
I was diagnosed at 18yrs old, i am 25 now. It has been one struggle after another.
This past year is the first time i ever felt any sense of normal. but i hit a really bad low to finally push myself to get here.
I have been on lithium for a year this past august and it was a life safer for me. However i am on a few meds...
I am taking serequel, welbutrin xl, lamotrigine and lithium) and i did a program of CBT with a group, and CBT on my own with my counselor.

are you on any other medications? maybe speaking to your psych doc would help as maybe there would be some extra insight?
Penny_Varis
Penny_Varis
I'm currently on lithium, but no other medications. I've tried almost everything, any I either have horrible reactions or they do nothing so far... I even got desperate enough that I did 9 rounds of ECT earlier this year (Electro-convulsive Therapy, where they put you under anesthesia and electrocute your head to induce seizures) which did some pretty good things to my mood, but for me the side effects where really bad, I was in constant pain and had some really scary temporary memory loss and memory issues.
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