what does asking whereabouts mean?

I'm confused as to the gist of the question

Confused...what form of self-treatment are you talking about?

I think all of us want to understand and be able to reply to your question.

Maybe if you rephrased it ?

{{HUGS}}

Asking whereabouts, as in posting "HAS ANYONE SEEN ___? SEND PRAYERS"

Self treatment, as in indulging consequential habits because they reward forms of pleasure, in a life that needs it.

People will often want to talk about their problems, when there's no solution, and when it reinforces negative thinking, because it provides pleasure. People with severe depression will do things that they even try to rationalize to themselves, because they need that pleasure.

It's a real commonality in this field. Why do you think we're inclined to go to hospitals? We are* in need of certain pleasures, and it's dangerous.

Well..I agree, sometimes people will go over and over an issue , that has no solution, if only for the "pleasure" of self flagilation

I think I understand what you are expressing
If my answer was inept or off base..... please forgive
{{hugs}}

the thing is, undead paragon, if we do something Different, and reinforce the idea that they should Man Up about their feelings - you know, suck it up, Don't go to hospital every 5 minutes, there might be Just as many problems as when they Do get their feelings "reinforced" by going to hospital when depressed, etc.


Sometimes it seems it's a losing battle between a rock and a hard place, but we Are where we Are, at any given moment in our understanding of ourselves and our illness.


There are people who are Ready to put on big-girl or big-boy panties and tough it out, but only because they have come to a point where they See there must be a better way to get out of the cycle, but it is normal Not to be there yet, and it's perhaps just as dangerous to keep Away from the things that have encouraged us in the past...

I think I know what you are saying, but anything we think really only applies to Us, at the moment. It's kinda like medication, because what works for the One person might not work for someone Else, you know?


How many of us (um, I do this) write something about Anything, in general, on here or any website we're on, and then go back to Look to see who has responded and what they said?

It's a need for validation, and it's Human Nature (not just a bipolar thing, or anything). A lot of times we spend our whole lives Needing , or desiring, the approval and reassurance of others to help us feel better....which is kinda why it's nice when someone asks about us, on one of those posts about "Where is...?"


We can learn to Live without the reassurance of others, yes. Eventually...because we learn to believe in Ourselves, which might also help with depression and Many things, but I believe it is okay to be comfortable Right where we Are, first. Even if that means we learn to stop Hating ourselves for running to the hospital every 5 minutes.

Once we accept ourselves as we Are, all needy and weak (haha, been there), then we feel "better enough" to get Stronger...


Does that make sense, at all?

I think there's a big difference between empathy and sympathy... Empathy can be so helpful and validating where as sympathy can cause harm even if it's not intended...xo

I don't think you have to say man-up to discourage sympathy addiction. I think you need, as SunCloud said, empathy and education, and to not do things that encourage people to be at breaking point/suicide point/hospitalization point/relapse point.

I think if we try to take good care of ourselves and go to our treatments and appointments every month and keep on a schedule along with the right support in our lives we can be some what happy in life. Sometimes we need to think of the good we have in our life and think when there is some one less fortunate. I hope this helps.