Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
So I have been fighting off a lot of suicidal ideation lately. At first there wasn't a lot of intent, but in the last couple of days its been a little harder to resist the impulse to just down my bottle of klonopin. So my problem with this is that I'm pretty sure my next reaction would be to call 911 or a friend for help or something.
So that makes me just an attention seeker right? And I don't even know what I want attention for.... but its not like I am desperate to die... I just want everything to stop for a while.
I don't even know where these ideas are coming from and I know I have to be honest with my pdoc on monday but how do I explain all of this without her thinking that a) I am an imminent danger to myself, or b) that I am just being dramatic. I don't think that I am going to hurt myself in the near future (even though I know I've been sliding in that direction)....I dunno
Like I feel like I'm being disrespectful to the people here who are really and truly in crisis and like somehow I'm a fraud. I just can't get the ideas out of my head.
I don't even know if any of this made any sense...I was just wondering if I go to my pdoc with this if she is just going to blow it off as no big deal or make way too big of a deal about it. What do you guys think?
So that makes me just an attention seeker right? And I don't even know what I want attention for.... but its not like I am desperate to die... I just want everything to stop for a while.
I don't even know where these ideas are coming from and I know I have to be honest with my pdoc on monday but how do I explain all of this without her thinking that a) I am an imminent danger to myself, or b) that I am just being dramatic. I don't think that I am going to hurt myself in the near future (even though I know I've been sliding in that direction)....I dunno
Like I feel like I'm being disrespectful to the people here who are really and truly in crisis and like somehow I'm a fraud. I just can't get the ideas out of my head.
I don't even know if any of this made any sense...I was just wondering if I go to my pdoc with this if she is just going to blow it off as no big deal or make way too big of a deal about it. What do you guys think?
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Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
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Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
if re-directing your thoughts is not working well enough and you feel unsafe, ask for and get help.
and no...i really don't think it is attention seeking. i just don't buy into that (although, when it is me, i wonder too) it could be a sign of increased activity of you bipolar process...intrusive suicidal thoughts. i have these and see them as a sign to get help. i also hate it when i have them.
can you call your pdoc, as i have often heard here...maybe your meds need adjusting. hugs to you.
Its good you have a plan for yourself and this is not attention seeking at all It is wise thinking
I know what you mean when you say you want everything to stop for awhile but keep in mind that death is forever. I know that wanting of putting life on "pause" but unforutately that doesn't happen. Are there people you can talk to? A good support group? If not, call your pdoc right away!!