Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
I wasn't sure how to list this topic so I just decided to do it in a general way.
Since I learned that I will need to be put on some sort of BP (mood stablizer) medication in order to continue treatment for a medical condition I have (Hep C), I have been doing alot of thinking, reminiscing and talking (with Tats) about my history with Psych meds, psychiatrist and with the mental health community in general.
What I have come up with is that I believe alot of my basis against both medication and the mental health community has come from the fact that each and every time I have had involvement with the mental health community (including Psychiatrist), have been marred by my ending up over medicated.
This I do not hold the mental health community fully to blame on, my psych history goes back a long way to a fairly young age and my first hospitalization was at the age of 19 during a severe mixed-episode in which I made a suicide attempt that by all accounts should have taken my life( and it wasn't my first attempt). I believe since then because of that incident and ones that would come later, that Psychiatrist have always thought better safe than not and started me on high does of medication, which have always left me feeling like the walking dead or had other side effects that I was not willing to accept, so I never stayed on the meds.
This time (with Tats help), by talking and working with the Dr's, I am hopping to find medications that I can use at their lowest effective doses, so that this can be a positive and therapeutic experience for me.
I wonder how many others have had experiences similar to mine? or have stopped taking a med or quit taking meds altogether because they have felt they were over-medicated or couldn't handle the side affects?
WW
Since I learned that I will need to be put on some sort of BP (mood stablizer) medication in order to continue treatment for a medical condition I have (Hep C), I have been doing alot of thinking, reminiscing and talking (with Tats) about my history with Psych meds, psychiatrist and with the mental health community in general.
What I have come up with is that I believe alot of my basis against both medication and the mental health community has come from the fact that each and every time I have had involvement with the mental health community (including Psychiatrist), have been marred by my ending up over medicated.
This I do not hold the mental health community fully to blame on, my psych history goes back a long way to a fairly young age and my first hospitalization was at the age of 19 during a severe mixed-episode in which I made a suicide attempt that by all accounts should have taken my life( and it wasn't my first attempt). I believe since then because of that incident and ones that would come later, that Psychiatrist have always thought better safe than not and started me on high does of medication, which have always left me feeling like the walking dead or had other side effects that I was not willing to accept, so I never stayed on the meds.
This time (with Tats help), by talking and working with the Dr's, I am hopping to find medications that I can use at their lowest effective doses, so that this can be a positive and therapeutic experience for me.
I wonder how many others have had experiences similar to mine? or have stopped taking a med or quit taking meds altogether because they have felt they were over-medicated or couldn't handle the side affects?
WW
-
Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
-
Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
the thing that caught my eye is that they always start you on high doses bcs they see you as high risk.... no wonder you've felt bloody awful on them
you are a smart man who I know has researched what possible meds you can take without suffering dire consequences... I wish you well... with the Hep C treatments as well x
Over medicated is the WORSE, because they don't understand our lethargic, depression - they just see, keep us out of suicide zone. So, my concern for me Also is to stay out of suicide zone.
I never stay with a pdoc that doesn't work as a "team" and listen...sorry you haven't had that ability or luck! I also do not think one pill makes or breaks me, or that I have to stay on something...
I live one good mood at a time, and try and stay "Healthy" which for me, is not too be a crazy, some times suicidal person - I need meds, to let me do better choices in care, which is about 30% meds, 70% wanting to change and be BETTER - healthier : ) using all the OTHER stuff -
I have to be willing to change, I never say NO to everyone, I would lose out - hoping you an EASY transition, to at least get through the treatment!!!!!!
It's heavy shit but it's...character forming I spose.
Gallows humour I'm afraid.
All the best whatever you go for. I know that being able to have a choice in this world is one of the most important things to have.
I am on a few medications and none of them give me any side effects, but it took a long time to get there. Good Luck with your journey.
It took a lot of courage and open-mindedness to revisit your mental health history from a slightly different perspective. I think I detect in your words a sense of peace and understanding that wasn't there before. Also less anger and resistance. Do you know what an incredible gift that was for yourself? I think it makes you very receptive to good healing with your new treatment.
I'm glad Tats could be there with you through this journey.
Good luck!! :)
I am also taking a medication that makes me stable but causes the side effect of tremors. I lost my job because of the tremors. I have to weigh the benefit of stability against the benefit of being unstable and tremor free. This past summer I went off the medication to get rid of the tremors and hopefully find a med that would make me just as stable. Three hospitalizations later I'm back on the original medication at a much lower dosage. I can just feel the tremors coming back. But my pdoc and I are working on it together. We are being cautious and deliberate in our med changes since I react so sensitively. We are truly a team.
More often than not, I spent my time in a hypo-manic to stable state. When hypo, I tend to be slightly to moderately irritable, aggressive and arrogant. That is why I have spent a great deal of my life learning my mood shifts and learning life coping strategies such as DBT, meditation and self discipline techniques. just so that I can function in life.
Were I get into trouble is when I have an event that happens in my life that triggers a mixed/ dysphoric manic episode. See I'm not one of these people who get the euphoric mania. Mine is generally characterized by Extreme agitation, paranoia, thoughts of grandiosity an on occasion extreme aggression. When I get like that I hate everything and everyone. But not one more so than myself( that's where the suicide attempts have come from not from being depressed).
What has brought about my willingness and change to look once again to the medical field for help is, when I started the treatment for the Hep C, the medication for it started to trigger one of those life events that has sent me into a mixed episode and to tell you the truth that scares the hell out of me, because I need this treatment.
Any way I don't know what prompted me to write is post, I guess I've been doing a lot more reflecting and just wanted to get it out.
WW
I've found that for me when I've been in a bad state of mind the meds have been at a higher dose...
When I've needed a tweak do to (usually) situational challenges I'm struggling with doses have started smaller...I've found my pdoc will work with and listen to me.. I hope you have a positive experience getting back on meds sweetie..xo
good on you... and welcome to the reinforcement of giving in to love and reason ...so as to build up ways to work things out together ...
wisdom has you on its agenda ....i just know it...
love you man...for real...
Currently I am with a Pdoc that I love and have been with for 7 years. I am on a cocktail that works amazingly and is not that strong. Tegretol 400mg, Flexerill 30mg, Klonopin 2mg & Clonodine .01mg. I'm not with a Tdoc right now because I've been in therapy on and off for 23 years and frankly I'm tired of talking, I Journal religiously. I know alot of you are looking at my meds and saying Flexerill what the hell that's a muscle relaxer, well actually, cyclobenzaprine began as an old school tricylic anti-depressant and it works really well for me.
So, I"ve been all over the place over the last 23 years but right now I'm in a good place, a better place than I've been in years, and the cocktail I'm on is good and not super strong. Since I also have a seizure disorder the Tegretol dose double duty.
I wish you well on your journey.
Kat
I was on a toxic dose of Depakote. I had suicidal thoughts and tried to kill myself. After hospitalization, they lowered the dose and I eventually switched to another mood stabilizer, but my depression continues to go untreated.
See I had one pdoc, that I basically treated myself. I went in told him the medication and mgs I wanted and he wrote me a script, I could have gotten anything from him. He is the one I got the doctors site and password from. I lost the password about a year ago...dang it because with my memory not being good I can't remember it.
So you have to take charge, research and Tats help is Awesome.
((((((((HUGS))))) WW. Remember we all care!!!!!!!!!!!
LOL, now you have me thinking of Waldo!
Well after having a good conversation with her about my history, she said that she did not feel qualified to handle this phase of my health care needs, but she did know of a Pdoc and his PA ( a Husband and Wife team)who were very good and after listening to my concerns would be she believed that they would be a good fit.
Here's the ironic part, my G doc ( who is actually a PA; Bonnie) is good friends and went to medical School with the P doc's PA (his Wife) and both Bonnie and the P doc's PA are friends with and went to medical school with my Gastro PA; Meagan.
Now I have a great deal of respect for both Bonnie and Meagan, they are both very professional, knowledgeable and compassionate people, who are also open minded and willing to work with the people they treat.
As a result of their respect for this Husband and Wife Psychiatric team, it has me a little more at ease and hopefully a little more open-minded in going to meet with them.
Oh Yeah, I forgot to mention Bonnie called her friend and made a referral for me to make an appointment. The P doc's office called back and I have an appt set up on Oct. 9
WW