Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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HannaHana 07/13/2009

We're all BP, and sure it could be just that we're the lucky lotto winners. But I want more than that.

Do you think there is some deeper reason to us being BP? Something with the cosmos or whatever? Has God or whoever made us BP for a reason?

Please share your thoughts.

~HH

deleted_user 07/13/2009

I know we have all had our hard times but I feel I have grown from much of it and learned alot, met many great people on the path re BD and worked in the field
I still have my struggles at times but I dont feel I ever walk alone
God is Good and I need him every day!

HannaHana 07/13/2009

Thanks for all the replies.

I, personally, don't have any 'gifts' from this illness. I just ride the waves as I have to. I'm not creative, I don't do art or poetry. I'm not musically inclined. For me, there is nothing good about this illness.

I may think more deeply than any saner, but it's hard to mesh into society when you don't think along the same lines. Society is what makes this jail I suppose.

I am here, and the only thing I have to offer anyone is my 'gift' of knowledge and experience with the disease...but we all know that you can't make anyone understand or accept this illness without them experiencing it for themselves first hand.

Where is MY purpose? What am I supposed to do?

deleted_user 07/13/2009

When I'm up, it's a blessing. I'm a special person that gets to look into deeper levels of reality and gain gnosis of the blissful consciousness/force of the universe: the great mystical experience of Life.

When I'm down it's a curse and I'm one of God's rejects, or there is no god and I'm just plain fucked.

When I'm stable (relatively), I'm fairly neutral on it but skewed more toward it just being a bitch. Mainly a curse. Whether from god or genetics, just something I have to deal with that most people don't.

But, as dd says, it's definitely not the worse thing to deal with and I feel fairly lucky at the end of the day.

deleted_user 07/13/2009

What do you like to do Hanna? Any passion about anything?

For me the why no longer matters, it's simply about what to do with it now.

HannaHana 07/14/2009

I suppose you're right sintheta.

Why ask about the 'why' when there really isn't an answer.

I'll still struggle with what to do with myself, but if I drop the "why me?" crap then I guess that just leaves me with life...and that's the whole point of everything.

thanks all for your replies.

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