Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
How do you communicate with your hubby when you're scared that he's gonna get mad at you?? I flipped out earlier today because I thought the hubby would get mad if I told the truth and turns out he didn't get mad. My friend helped me communicate to him and all is fine now. I also have a hard time speaking my needs for example I ususally end with Friday's off because my little one goes to a friends house to spend the night on Fridays....well starting tomorrow he's gonna send the step daughter home on the bus and force quality time on me when it's a pain taking care of her because she never listens to me and always mouths off....so it bothers me. It's kinda like she secretly hates me subconsiously because I am not her real mother or some such rot. Well it's totally uncomfortable on both ends....anyhow I forced myself to talk to him about the fact that he's gonna force contact between us....and he said if it makes you feel any better to miss your friday nights despite that those nights I get paranoid the most alone then he will have his mom pick her up at like 6:30 every friday night and I will have the rest of the night to myself. I have a hard time talking to people when scared and it's something really important and I just wonder How do the people that have an easy time communicating communicate?? What's your secrets??
tommymott
I can't say that I'm great at communicating. I think it's something that takes a lot of work for some of us.
BipolarPrincess
I am one of those people too that have a hard time commicating.....I buckle and get scared.....all because he wanted me to say that the reason wasn't because of her glasses with her headaches when it was and didn't want to tell the other eye company that we got a second opinion.....and turns out he really didn't care if they knew we had a second opinion or not and didn't care if I told the truth.....so it all ends up boiling down to my insecurities when talking to the hubby and I really wish I knew how to be more secure.
deleted_user
I "think" a good conversation in my head, but I never get it to come out that way. I buckle too. So I guess all I can say is you're not alone, maybe I will learn something from this post too :)
BipolarPrincess
I always know what I want to say it's just coming out and saying it is the problem for me.
BipolarPrincess
Thanks for the comments Everyone.....I don't feel so alone now.
deleted_user
I think a lot of the time we all think the other will get mad when its not true. Maybe one bad experience makes us feel like that.
BipolarPrincess
I have had bad experiences in the past with hubby overreacting.....I guess I always fear the worse because of that.....if only I knew how to let go.
deleted_user
Its so hard, because I feel like all I say is negative things, and that I am a burden to him. He is very quiet and doesnt talk about any feelings. Then I feel like a big "blabbering idiot". I dont know how to do it right, never have and always end up pissing someone off!
deleted_user
it's hard to me nice when you have BP. Sonetimes I was awful to my husbad but I learned to apaigise and thank him later for putting up with the Bp. (not me) Over the years he learned to separate the BP from me and we had 30 wonderful years before his passing. We even learned to laugh at the BP together. On a good day talk to him about how you can help spare your step from the BP and get to know you. If he understands he can talk to her about it and that brings you all one step closer. I think being BP we have to love a little more to make up for our disease.
deleted_user
it depends on what i am trying to communicate whether or not i have a problem. if it is everyday stuff i am ok, but bp stuff is really hard with dh and kidlet, but ok with my mom, cause she is bp too and understands. i am way better communicating with pdoc since i told dh i wasn't being honest and neither he nor pdoc would ever know my deepest secrets. he told me he didn't care if he ever knew, but how important in my care it would be for pdoc to know everything, since then i have been honest with pdoc. surprisingly enough, i am painfully honest with you all despite being literal strangers.
deleted_user
Your step-daughter does hate thatyou are not her mother, that is normal. There is also that father-daughter jealousy thing that naturally makes you the invading army. Accepting that is half the battle. Try to be a friend to her. Also I would try to cut back any open affection with your hubby in front of her. Just act like you would if your boss were there. BP supplies us with so many problems we don't need to add any. I would praise her to your husband and comment to her how much her Dad cares about her. her visits are really not about you, let time create the bond and be there for your husband.
BipolarPrincess
The problem with that idea is we'd be alone together.....the hubby is gonna be working on Friday...he's trying to push alone time with the two of us.....
deleted_user
Well for the most part I feel like I can communicate with my man but there are certain things that he will not talk about really and it makes me mad. He changes the subject or just ignores what I say. He doesnt liek to talk about my bipolar either. Its like he just wants it to dissapear or just pretend it does not exist. He hasnt even went online to educate himself about it and I am ashamed to even call him up to the computer and show him something about it cuz he will just blow me off about it. But above all of that we are very much in love and we go great together.
deleted_user
I am always brutally honest with my husband and it always makes me feel better and opens up opportunites for us to bond more. Sometime the truth hurts wether it be coming from me or his reaction to something that I have done. But overall truth is my avenue.
BipolarPrincess
Thanks everyone.....I guess I just have to get over my insecurites and things will probably be easier.....at least that's my take on all of the responses. Thanks!
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