Hanna your not a burden...I think your a great friend!

Wow, good question, I am in the same boat today, I am doing what I can with what I have got, I too am tired of feeling like a burden. Maybe I am just being stubborn it does take courage to ask for help.

Alot of Grandma's are in that very same position and love it !!!Take help wherever you can get it ..your not supposed to do it all alone !! None of us can. Esp. with 2 kidlets , must be such a handful. Your doing your best girl .. thats all you can do

Thanks lisa and calm.

It's not just the feeling of being a burden, it's knowing that the person helping you is feeling that way too. It makes me feel worse.

I wish i had the help that u had Hanna.

I'm definitely getting to be stubborn. I'm ready to cut ties for a while, just to give Mom a break from me and my kids.

You need a definition of friendship and family and love.
It's not clear in BP.

People need you.That's what you might not see.

Pluck has a point, we rob people of the joy of being our friends and loving us when we decline help.

I see that my kids need me. I also see that my Mother needs a good long break from me and my kids. She's got my sister to tend to, and her baby.

i won't accept or ask for help unless it's a major emergency. i don't want people to know how bad i am.

Unfortunately it's obvious that I'm not well, and possibly not well enough to do it on my own. But it's been a long time that my Mom has been giving me a break, and she deserves one, and has made it very clear that she needs one.

She asked that I go out to her house to transition a little, but that was after a change of plan that she was going to come to my own house for the transition.

What's the point of transitioning at her house? This is where we live...here...125 miles away from her house.

Just ranting, don't mind me.

Thanks plain.

I understand what you're saying. But there's still this horrible guilt I have for impressing my horrible inadequacies on other people...and on top of it, the helper not quite following through (trying to get out of helping). Guilt is what I have right now. And I'm sure there's more to come.

guilt is AWFUL...serves no purpose....if you need her help...all you can do is let her know you appreciate it and try to do little things to let her know...just do what you CAN...and then stop the persecution. i have done the same thing withmy mother...the guilt is a TOTAL waste!

do you have other potential helpers? sometimes i forget that i have other helpers that can rotate. my mom gives me credit for taking the initiative to take some of the burden off her for a period of time or intermittent. just a thought. we're bps and part of our being on ds is to try to be open with other people that we need help. imho

When I start to feel like this, I think to myself if the tables were turned how would I feel??
I would so take care of someone in my family that needed me. That is what family is..
I hate feeling like this too and I understand feeling like we want to do it all ourselves, but having this disorder makes most of us unable to..
What if you had to go to dialysis three times a week for four hours at a time and needed someone to watch your kids, would you feel less like a burden because something was physically wrong with you as apposed to mentally??
HUGS and I enjoy all that you give to DS.. Your kids will be so happy to see you.. When you do get them back and they are in bed sleeping, curl up with them and kiss their little foreheads and feel the love..
That is when I love my kids the most, when they are sleeping..LOL