i am going through a lot of changes and have been pondering loneliness.

loneliness and isolation are very tricky things for me because I know how closely it is intertwined with my depression and as a consequence very low self-esteem comes into play.

i am leaving a marriage and when I tell a few people a brief story about it or they happen to know my ex-spouse they all refrain, 'Good, he wasn't right for you.'  (I will state here that he has never been supportive during my mental health breaks nor with my medication nor therapy.  And another big issue too)

i guess I'm feeling pretty lost right now, because I don't know what is right for me anymore regarding friendships and relationships.  I have this new social anxiety surrounding me because of, I dunno, embarrassment?  Feeling like a failure?

i have to look at myself in the mirror sometimes like stuart smalley and say, "sensitivehobolady, you DESERVE to be treated well."

i guess my hopes in sharing this here is that others might feel compelled to share how they got through really difficult times of loneliness and isolation...and how do you pick up the pieces again and authentically connect with others again?  I'm feeling really terrible lately and have cried more than I think I ever have in life.