go to the hospital mush. just the thoughts of death/self harm should be enough to get in-patient.

Can you seek help for it through your psychiatrist or a hospital? I got back on Abilify but my episodes were not quite as advanced as yours. I did seek help from my psychiatrist who put me back on it.

I hope you feel better soon.

Agree, go to the hospital hun, you dont have to live this way, the hospital saved my life....

Sleep is my great healer if I can via xanax and or trazodone and or tylenol pm.

Even just resting helps during the hardest times and hopefully you will nod off for a bit.

sweetie, all these disturbing experiences add up to one thing....you need to seek help for yourself.

It is time. Go to the hospital and please, please take care.

im scared they'll think im lying or exaggerating.
the lights are flickering.
i have no medication or doctor or anything.
ive got no way of getting to the hospital its miles away
im alone, with no money no car.

what about going to the local "surgery" or clinic mush?

And they have to believe you...it is your thoughts and experiences.

Why would they think you are lying?

Do you have a family member or friend that can get you to the hospital and/or clinic?

it is scary. i understand.

mush, if you can go out partying, go to classes,go to market, etc, etc you can get yourself to a hospital. take a taxi or bus, or call a mate.

it's the step you need to take at this point. we're all in your corner, and support you in this.

my gp is my only source really. i should go up.

i guess because my family has left me. i'll have to go alone.

Sounds like a good plan your gp should be able to help you get into the hospital. Positive thoughts are sent your way.

When you feel disconnected like this... try grounding yourself hun.

Touch your favorite objects....
do a mundane chore... or
take care of yourself like... brush your hair... your teeth...
take a shower...

Try and ground yourself, and reconnect with reality in a way that brings you back down... and calms the thoughts.

Just a suggestion of course.... I know its hard to stop thoughts that you are not in control of.

borderline type psychotic?

thanks gumption , i did some housework this morning its helped me feel more grounded great suggestion

I would definitely go to the hospital to get this calmed down. I know its not fun but necessary. Take care and lots of hugs!