1st let me say I am so sorry for your loss! I also understand the way you feel about your kitty, I've had 2 females and the 1st was very ill off and on with hyperthryoidism for a long time. I lost my husband on Jan. 23, 2007, then my mother passed away Dec. 9, 2007. Then I had trouble in my family and it seemed like I/we were being punished by God for some reason. I kept praying and I believe He listened, and helped me through, one day at a time. I also went to a free grief support group and sometime later started seeing an individual grief therapist. The grief support group was able to give me support and direct me in case I had any questions they could answer. Grief support groups can be found through churches, hospice groups, sometimes hospitals...and I found mine through a friend who found it through the funeral home.

Hi,

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. I hope you find comfort and support here on DS.

You asked if GOD would hear your prayers. My answer, from experience, is a most definite YES! Remember, GOD made you, and part of His design is a working brain. Working brains ask questions, they doubt, they seek reassurance, evidence and facts. Your doubts and questioning are totally normal and "by design."

May I suggest asking GOD to help you manifest the fruits of the Spirit? To guide you every day?

An affirmation that has helped me along the way is: In the Name of Jesus Christ, I give thanks for joy in my life. I give thanks and praise to GOD for (fill in the blank).

Some days, the only thing you may feel grateful for is that you have oxygen to breathe. But I guarantee He will hear you and respond! Blessings and gratitude multiply to create more blessings and gratitude.

I am going to a grief support group but it is every other week. I wish it were weekly. I can't afford therapy right now. I too feel like God is punishing me and I asked for His forgiveness for everything and I pray that He will help me. I do give Thanks to God for the little I do have but everything is so overwhelming that I need a miracle. I will do the affirmations you suggest LOveShanti. I try not to have doubts but it is so hard when your life is falling apart. I tell God I leave it in His hands bt then I beg for him to make it better.

The pain of losing my BF was bad but all the other stuff especially the lack of work is just too much to bear. I won't stop believing bt it is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

QP

QP-I'm so sorry for your loss. Staying positive is not an easy thing. Some days the best I can do is tell myself "ok, I don't feel positive now, but I know I will later, so keep going." Having to deal with finances while grieving is really difficult and overwhelming. Realize that you can only do a little at a time, and you can't send money you don't have. Some creditors will actually work with you if you call them. But be prepared-sometimes they can be threatening and heartless, in which case you have to tell them (and yourself) that you're trying to find a way to make it right. Since my wife died in August, I've had times when, like you, I wasn't doing good, but at least making it ok. But then I'd have what you called 'relapse'. I think that's normal, and it will happen more than once. It seems for me the first couple of months were easier than now. But I know I'll be handling it better in the future. Some bad days are going to be part of the process. Last sunday night, I just couldn't fathom that I was actually expected at work the next morning...it had been three months since Kim passed away, but all of sudden it felt like it had just happened that day. But I talk with God, I admit to Him my anger at Him, and my doubts about Him. I feel closer to God when I'm honest-He knows how I feel anyway, so I might as well talk about. It helps. It also helps to spend time with people-I try to be with family and friends as much as I can. I also call and email friends that live too far away. Keep praying and reaching out for help. One day at a time, and when you go to bed, pat yourself on the back for having made it through another day. You've got my prayers.

Thank You LangAllen,

I am sorry about the loss of your wife. I also seemed to be handling it better the first few months. I thought it would be better by now. I didn't expect a miracle just better than the first 2 months. I guess you are right that God knows what I am thinking. I don't think anything bad. I just wonder why I not only had to go through this but my cat almost died and now I have huge bills and no job prospects and why is it all at once. It is too much to bear. I am depending on God to make me more positive because Lord knows I don't have the strength within me right now. I do rely heavily on friends and family. I keep praying even though I don't have the energy and have doubts in the back of my mind that things ae always going to be this bad. I hope God will forgive me. I will keep praying and I will pray for you too. Thank You for your kind words and eaching out to me after all you have been through too.

QP