AfterBrads untimely death of 5/22/09,I made a vow that once or twice a week i will share my experience with everyone at daily strength because noone should go thru what i have been thru.Friday it will be 6 weeks and the grief is almost subsiding.Because I am finding out things about Brad that has horriefied me.First of all,...I found out that Brad told the doctor that he was having trouble sleeping.This is a lie.Brad slept at odd hours and sometimes he slept all day.He would constantly be on his computer and when he would awake he would make coffee,shower and go on the computer again.I dont know what he was doing in there.Secondly-Brad told the doctor that he was having money problems.This is a lie.He was collecting since May unemployment.He had 14,000.00 left on his claim.He spend a great deal of money on his cars and the computers and when i asked where the money was coming from,.he went beserk.I also found out that Brad was a member of this sex hot line.I dont know
who was talking to but all I know is that he was having an affair and took her to Red Lobster.I dont know what he told her but it isnt my fault that I lost my hearing.If Brad wasnt always screaming about the way that I cleaned and the house...maybe we would still be together...but Brad was always and i mean always screaming.And I just got tired of it so i began
to live my life separate.I began to do the things that I like and Brad just
didnt like anything.I will never be friends with any person again who
doesnt read books,read the paper,watch tv or such.I refuse.He just
did not read and i have come to the conclusion that Brad was illerate.
If he couldnt read...why didnt he go for help? We have wonderful programs here in washington and they are all free.We have people of all
ages in this program and once you learn to read...new world starts.Books have been my friend since I was a little girl and dont tell me that you dont have time.Everyone has time.You make the time and I told
Brad under no circumstances are we going to take people here and there.We have got Metro Transit here and the number is in the book.We have got buses to go all over and people must learn that Brad and I
did not have the means to take anyone any where.And here is something
that I told everyone here...if you are having any sort of problem...and the
problem is serious...please go for help.Washington has got now
support groups and low income therapy and I am taking low income th
therapy and some of these places you can get your medication for free.Help is available.You just have to reach out and ask...but if you are having money problems...please do not come to me at this time.Please
go to your case manager and they will give you a financial advisor and if
you are having credit problems...we have debt advisors who can help
you with your debts.I dont know who these people are coming to Brad with these serious problems.What they did not know is that Brad was just so overwhelmed with them...he couldnt handle it and this wont be the case with me.Right now...i am in the process of taking this class because I do need a part time job and finding a job is more important thenthen hearing about this and that from these people Brad found.The people at Daily Strength have given me the hope and optism.But do remember this...suicide isnt the way out...because the survivors are left in pain and I am in such pain nooone knows.Noone sees it.And I dont discuss this pain even with some of my closest friends.I have to learn to overcome this and I am going to and become a better person and friend in the process.end of this story..dont forget to watch the 3 stooges..go for it...I love Curly..dont you? Vader.