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2 1/2 years ago my husband lost his mom. They were very close. In fact when she was diagnosed with altimeters and could no longer take care of herself, he without second thought gave up his career and moved home to live with and care for her. He was devastated when she passed. Even if he acted ok, i knew better and that he would grieve a long time. I encouraged him to allow himself to grieve. And encourage him to seek help as well (which he constantly refused)
I don't really know what is normal when it comes to this level of loss.
I know that it's going on 3 yrs soon and my husband is yet to come back to me. I don't know what to do. A ounce very loving, gentle, patient man is now distant, angry all the time, uncaring. I barely recognize him.
He insists he is fine, and gets upset if i push the issue.
I'm worried. Idk how to help him or how to get him back.
Or Is this normal?
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
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Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
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Once again I've had a fever today. I'm not going to the hospital because that's a huge waste of time but I did schedule a dr appointment for Wednesday afternoon.
There are stages of grief and some may go through some or all of them
I'll put up a link at the end of this comment
My mom had Alzheimer's disease and I was really close to her and cared for her and it was agony to tell you the truth.... I was crushed and it seems that your husband was as well
I think 3 years is too long to be in this state …. I think he's either stuck or he's fallen into a depression and that needs medical treatment
It's not that unusual for a person grieving deeply to fall into depression... It can truly be traumatic I think watching someone with Alzheimer's that you love disappear(who they were) before your eyes and I think he was probably traumatized at least to a degree by this
I would ask him when things are calm to sit down and have a discussion if he tries to bully you or push you away I would think about what you want to do for yourself.
You've stood by him for three years and it sounds like he's treating you poorly and you deserve better then this
He may also have some PTSD from the experience? possibly?
Stages of Grief
https://www.recover-from-grief.com/7-stages-of-grief.html
Ptsd Symptom - Information
https://www.kensaq.com/Ptsd Symptom/Now
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Answer from 3 sources
PTSD symptoms are generally grouped into four types: intrusive memories, avoidance, negative changes in thinking and mood, and changes in physical and emotional reactions. Symptoms can vary over time or vary from person to person.
Post-traumatic stress disorder - Mayo Clinic
mayoclinic.org
Some of the most common symptoms of PTSD include recurring memories or nightmares of the event, sleeplessness, loss of interest, and feelings of numbness, anger or irritability, or being constantly on guard, but there are many ways PTSD can impact your everyday life
I think that he definitely needs professional help and there's no shame in that... It would be the same if he was diabetic or had a heart problem... You see someone that can help you to get better..... Gentle hug...… xo