Oh shoot. I was just assuming you meant scalp hairs. Sorry! Still doing good though!

Time at the computer is a big trigger for me, too. Barriers help, but only if I use them before I get urges. Once I start pulling, I can't stop to put on barriers. Remember that small goals are often best! Don't expect perfection - just try to improve gradually and forgive yourself for mistakes - they are bound to happen to all of us!

You can do this! I can say with strength, that to give your eyebrows the power to be special, just as they are, will give you the courage and bravery to leave them natural and keep your hands elsewhere!

For me, the medical condition part is being treated and that's helping me change the way I view my eyebrows. The daily effect of little changes does make a huge difference, it does!

I'm here, and wishing you the best!
Hugs instead of tugs!

Thanks for the support! I'm working on finding the strength to stay conscious of my hands when i get anxious. But lately I've been triggered into anxiety about a lot of things and haven't been kind to my eyebrows. I'll renew my consciousness on keeping my hands down now! I appreciate your kind words.

Surf the wave technique I tried to give my hands a larger pattern of movement might give you that few seconds of pause.

I start with my palms at the bottom of my face, and slowly move them up gently, up to the forehead. I do this four or five times. Then I take the palms around the back of my neck and go up the back of the scalp.

Give your hands a focus on the head, not the eyebrows. The eyebrow area is sensitive to anxiety sensations and provides the fast relief of a few anxiety symptoms.

Part of the "keeping hands down" works for the habit part of the cycle. The physical relief of the touch of the hands means healing happens (so we have to find the fine line between healing and hurting).

You're not alone in this, best wishes, hugs!

That's great advice, a pattern I can try to implement. Thank you!

Hiya! I'm sorry I haven't stopped by your thread yet. Sometimes I only have enough mental energy to update my own or comment on my old friends. I hope you're doing ok. There are a LOT of resources in this group.

Keeping your hands down takes serious commitment! It's okay if it takes some time. Have you tried using barriers in the meantime? Band aids on your fingers can be helpful, but do whatever works best for you!

I don't really have any great advice. Just come on here daily to post and find the support we all need. Also you could keep a journal either at home or on the daily strength forum. I wish you pull free days ahead. I am at day one again today. But I am not going to beat myself up over it - today is a new day - upwards and onwards.You can do it !! We can do it - together, with support!

Hi all, I'm sorry it's been a long time since I posted here. I was traveling in the summer, then started grad classes again, so I've been distracted from participating or reaching out. I've had some good days, and worked at controlling my urges, but other days are hard with big relapses. I hate that sudden heart sinking moment when I realize I've pull again. So here I am, again, hoping to reconnect with you all.

I feel good about some progress I've made and some regrowth I'm experiencing right now. It's encouraging to see new hairs growing, but also SO tempting and frustrating. I'm also not having even regrowth in my eyebrows and this is leading me to feel more shame about my appearance, even while I feel good about having more growth than I have in a long time. What do you all do with this conflicting need for growth but fear of people noticing, questioning?

Also, I wanted to ask for your advice. My boyfriend is being encouraging of me, and that's why I've been able to have some new growth. He's one of the few people I have talked with about this in my life. But a couple times lately he'd brought up my appearance and told me it embarrasses him. I'm going in December to meet his family for the first time, and he is worried about how my trich makes me look and that he'll have to explain things to them. He asks, "Can't you look normal and just have full regrowth by then?" Ugh. I'm so stressed by this and am struggling to talk to him about it. His impatience doesn't feel supportive. What should I say to him? How can I feel good while still knowing he thinks it's not good enough?

Thanks for your support and advice.

This is one of the hardest parts of having trich, is meeting people, who may not notice it, because they're worried about you see them. Parents are often looking to see how the couple relates to each other, so tell your boyfriend to relax about the trich, and focus on the good things you both can share comfortably when meeting the parents happens.

Don't think he is not supportive, he's trying to help based upon his perspective, and his limited experience. Smile, tell him thank you, and move on. It's not worth the pain, tears, shame, guilt, "what ifs" that can happen in trying to explain this condition for a "meet the parents" event.

Let the stress go. Do what it takes to make you feel comfortable right now. Anxiety related issues with trich are common and the best method with reducing anxiety stress is to keep moving. Stick with the "in the moment" and leave the long-term for what it is ... long-term.

His acknowledgement that your trich embarrasses him gives you a focus on making this feeling a positive one (it's not your problem to solve, it is your response that will give him the solution to resolve it). When someone told me my missing eyebrows bothered them, I looked at them and asked why?. They were not expecting me to give them a chance to say what they really felt. I did, and then I told them, it's your problem, not mine. I'm dealing with this the best way I can for me.

Impatience is a sign of wishing it to be temporary, and with trich, until you are able to release the long-term stress associated with trich, you will manage it, one way or another.

It took us a long time to come to terms with the changes in our relationship due to the trich, (it was used as an excuse a number of times), and to accept that it is getting better with the work, time, patience, effort, and determination to make the best of the situation that creates the tension of trich.

Best wishes. Feel good because you know you are doing the best you can with what you have, right now, in this moment! And, remember, just because he thinks it, does not mean it's true. His perspective is based upon his limited experience, and he will learn from your positive response that you respect his opinion, even if you know it is not what you want to hear. The more you are positive, the easier he will be with giving a positive spin on it, whether he believes it. Once I stopped trying to change hubby's view, and instead focused on responding in a way to build my confidence, and his usual response did not fit the situation, he changed his response on his own.

Please know we support you, value you, and encourage you to keep going with this journey. You got this covered!

Wow thank you so much. I cannot articulate how much your words help me to see a better perspective on this situation.

I will keep focusing on the positive and using the right wording for how I feel, he'll come to understand with time. I'm glad I have support from him and from you! I know I am strong enough to keep going, working, focusing on my hands, and reducing my stresses. Hope you're feeling empowered today, too!

I'm glad it helps. Stay with it!

Fantastic response mid.. I completely agree with everything you said.

Panthera, that's tough, but not very surprising. It's so hard for other people to understand. But Trich is NOT something to be ashamed of. That must have hurt to hear though :( Getting rid of the shame tied to this condition is a process. I'm glad mid's response helped you :)

Thanks so much! I'm still working on getting rid of the shame, but realizing it's hard to let go of something I've been carrying around for so long. I can do it!

I'm still working on feeling good and pulling less. In some situations I feel I'm making a lot of progress, but have been finding the urges coming on in the evening at home so I need to do something about that...

Wishing everyone here has strength and self-caring today! Including myself.