Hi! I'm sorry about your stepson. Your worries have taken over. The truth is that all of your worrying cannot change outcomes. It's time to start living life again.

Greeneyes, I completely agree with you. I guess my mindframe is at a point where I feel like I need to do everything in my power to make sure no one gets hurt. And the worrying is exhausting, and also trying to have that super power to be able to stop any negative outcomes is also very exhausting. I truly hope that one day I can get in the mindframe that I can’t control everything and I have to just have faith that everything will be OK. In the meantime I’m trying to find ways to call my mind and stop worrying so much.

Exercise does help me. I get up pretty early just so I can get a walk in every morning. It helps me drain my brain a bit. I either get on the treadmill or walk outside depending on the weather or how dark it is outside.

I also find distractions are helpful, focusing on tasks that require some serious concentration or being with other people. Having a challenging job makes it easy for me to just throw myself into work so I don’t have a lot of time to just sit and think about what I’m worried about.

Years ago, I almost died from a sudden onset health issue and during my recovery, even though I was totally out of the woods, my anxiety was through the roof, worrying about dying, worrying about other people dying, worrying about living, worrying myself into a frenzy to the point of starting to have panic attacks. I found therapy really helpful in curbing some of the super heightened anxiety during that period.

For me, I also apply meditation techniques and practicing positive mantras to be helpful when I’m having intense anxiety cycles.

How you make the time is just committing to make the time. I know it’s not easy but there is time. It’s how we decide to spend our time and on what, right?

I know how exhausting the worrying is and trying to control everything. It's kind of an OCD thing. Exercise probably would help and just getting out of your head with doing other activities that engage your mind like work or cleaning the house or reading or just anything really. It's really hard though. I'm so sorry about your stepson. Thanks for writing this. It made me think of ways to deal with this problem for myself too.

Thank you for the replies!

I just need to make time to exercise. Even my husband says that I’m at my best in all forms when I exercise.
I definitely am occupied throughout the day as we own our own business and open 7 days a week. So there’s no issues with trying to be distracted. It’s the sudden onset of a thought like “oh it’s lunch. I hope my kids are ok on the playground” and if the phone rings I’m terrified that someone is hurt or in an accident (I think that’s because my husband called me when my stepson passed away….my husband was at a hockey tournament).

I need to exercise. That’s all there is to it. And yes, yoga too. Lol, how bizarre but I’m actually a registered yoga instructor but haven’t taught in 3 years.

Thanks again. I hope you are all doing ok. I’m always here if anyone needs a chat.
That’s one thing about seeing a counsellor is that when I had a moment and needed to talk to someone it wasn’t right then. So by the time my appointment came around I was passed that moment. I really like this DS.

Yeah the DS peer support is super. I wasn’t in therapy very long for that health crisis induced panic I mentioned, just like 6 weeks, once a week. I just didn’t know what was happening to me and it gave me some management tools. I just needed to do something to stop the proverbial bleeding because my anxiety was so out of control, almost paralyzing. But after that, it really was just applying whatever tools I learned and going from there. Having others outside of my family who got it was really helpful. Therapy is just one small piece and not always necessary.

I’m sorry for your loss as well. With some time. maybe some of that hyper vigilance will wane on its own too,

perfectly_imperfect I am so so sorry for your loss.
I am not the best person for advice giving, but I am a good listener. I tend to have the same issue as you. I am an EXTREME worrier, which I understand gets me no where, and I cannot change what is going to happen.
I am on DS a lot. I am sure many here will attest to that! Anyway, it is such a good place to let off how you are feeling. Sometimes I write the minute I wake up and have anxiety.
Anyway, I am not sure I am of much help right now. BUT you are NOT alone.
There are many people here who really care.
My best to you that you find peace.

After a lifetime (I’m 63) of anxiety and depression , with more trials of antidepressants than I care to admit, I found the acceptance method by Dr Claire Weekes to be the most beneficial thing I have tried. It’s about accepting your anxiety symptoms without reacting to them. It’s not a quick fix, but learning how to adjust your thinking. It is also a method that once learned, stays with you. I’ve been using the method for about six months or so, there are so many things that have changed with me for the better, including the constant racing thoughts and “ worries.”

Mtd thanks! I’ll have to look into that :)
I’m sorry for your struggles.
I’m new here and am so surprised at the amount of people who struggle with anxiety and ptsd, etc. I just wish everyone could find something, anything to help.