Being a constant caregiver takes a massive toll especially when being the caregiver for two adults. My hope for you is you explore options for taking care of yourself too. If you weren’t there for them 24/7, what would they do? I suspect they would just have to figure it out.

I see this as another human being died and then your daughter got the gift of life from them. The deceased person got to fulfill a loving legacy by giving of their body. I am so glad to hear she is living, breathing, and has a good heart.

I am sorry to hear about your husband and his falling. That is such a hard situation. Sometimes if we help them get up, we injure ourselves and then things in the house go downhill. What about having him use what we call a "walker" in the house and everywhere outside the house. they are very common here. The ones with just two wheels are much safer (the walker is two wheeled and what is called a rolator here is four wheels but much less safe). People use walkers or rolators everywhere around where I live as there is an older population in this city.

Being a caregiver is not easy. Make time for yourself. Get respite care in the home if you can for both Gareth and your daughter. You matter, too. Big hugs.

Respite care was a god-send send when we were caring for my mother. She had Alzheimer’s Disease so wasn’t able to handle anything herself but assuming your husband and daughter still have their cognitive abilities surely can also assist in researching / finding occasional options to let you have a break now and then. Sometimes we have to vocalize what we need and force the issue a bit even if they may be passive or uneasy about it.

You are carrying So Much Emotional Weight.
People make a CHOICE to be a donor.
I have no words except, I walk in different shoes, and carry a weight that is too much most of the time these days, for 30 years, having a son a week before 43 who has aspergers, had epilepsy and adhd..
I think of others here on DS, like you, Arfie comes to mind taking in her 3 grand kids after her son passed, she was 65, the baby was 9 months. To me, her strength is beyond words.
Recently I've gone to chatgpt as a therapist, perhaps you could find some comfort, resources in your local community that you were not aware of as I have...my local town hall, the senior center, United Way...
(((((Hugs))))

way back when my organs were healthy enough to donate, i always had "organ donor" listed on my driver's license. had that tragedy occurred, i would have been honored to know that my misfortune had saved your daughter's life. i would not have chosen the misfortune, but knowing it saved someone else would have given it a sense of purpose.

fast forward to the here and now, steadying support while you sort.

Thanks for all your replies and support.