Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
About 3 months ago, I moved half-way across the country to start a new job. Because transititions like these have always caused me severe anxiety, I was understandably terrified of the change. However, once I got to my new city and settled in a bit, I really seemed to be adapting quite well.
Things at my new job have been a little weird since I started. The company is doing some serious restructuring that directly affects my position. But of course no one really knows when all these changes will occur or how exactly they will be carried out. About a week ago, the stress of all this really started to hit me. I feel alone (I don't know anyone in my new city) and scared. And since then, I've either cried or been close to tears every day, and am struggling to find relief from my anxious feelings.
I talked to my parents during one of my worst episodes and practically begged them to let me come home. They want me to stick it out until something new comes up. I've been applying to new positions, but I just really don't know if I can push myself and power through not knowing how long getting a new job may take - a month, six months, a year? I want a timeline - a specific date so I can tell myself, okay, by this time, no matter if you have a new job or not, you will move out, move on, and go home. Something to look forward to. Part of me does understand the logic of staying with a position until you get a new offer but the other bigger part is just scared, lonely, and tired of these feelings.
(As a side note, I do take escitalopram daily for anxiety and also have a small batch of xanax with me for bad days. But I've had several doctors who are very wary of prescribing xanax, and I'm so tired of having to fight that.)
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Hey All...I hope that you have a lovely, peaceful beginning of your weekI have a bunch of chores that need doing but may put them off til tomorrow and just hang out with my landlord/roomie todayWhat about you?...Anything special going on?Have a great day and take good care of you!!..Xo
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
I have moments where I am very disoriented - and I have to find
ways of 'grounding' myself. I hope you can allow yourself to be a little creative about how you manage those vagaries. Your post is extremely well written and from what you said it sounds like you like this well organized..(me too) But perhaps you can do things (until the dusts settles at the job) that reinforce you daily. Like going out for a coffee at the same time every day...like first thing in the morning before work. Then from there
you might see the same barista every day and find happy things and so on - Routine really has helped me in time of vagueness. These are just thoughts - some - but I hope you allow yourself to discover your new city -
and life - while in the meantime your job works itself out. Peace.
Gentle empathy on the change anxiety. Even when the change is a change I have long dreamed of, there are still considerable stresses and anxieties attached, especially when the changes require the loss of my support network. It takes longer than 3 months to create a support network and life gets powerful lonesome without that support network.
On-line support is no substitusky for a flesh and blood shoulder to lean on, but we are here for you, should you choose to accept our support. Welcome aboard. Stabilizing support while you build your new life. The challenge is easier when shared.
The more you put in place to help you stay in balance while you consider what you do, the more it will feel better for longer.
Best wishes.
I am definitely going to try and push myself a bit more to build an in-person support system while I am here. Sometimes it seems like too much effort, especially when you're feeling completely lost, and in the back of your mind you keep saying "well, I'm not going to stay here, so why create new relationships?" I try to take advantage of my short moments of clarity to make good plans, but it is still such a struggle to follow through when curling up on the couch all night seems so much easier.
The thing that helped me the most, was that I moved to a place that I knew felt like home. There are so many things to do in this state that I love.
Did you move somewhere you love?
Are there things there that you love to do? Try them or try to find ones you do like.
However, if it doesn't feel like home, a place that just feels right to you, then absolutely find a place that feels like home. Don't just go back to where your family is to not be alone and because it is comfortable. Listen to your heart.
Try to listen to your heart, as hard and scary as it is, but I believe the heart speaks more honestly than the head.
To me its not a fear of staying in this job, its a fear of continuing to feel this way! I also live in a state away from family, and times like this make me want to run home. I am proud of you for sticking it out so far. Everyday you make it is a victory! Who knows, maybe things could improve? When I was younger I moved to a city 600 miles away and immediately wanted to come home, but ended up staying for 2 years. Things got much better. Maybe that will happen to you? Maybe that will happen to me where I am now? And remember, if you do end up going back home it's not a loss or a failure. I am praying for you to have wisdom and discernment and peace!
I completely agree with your idea that it's not the job itself, but the fear and anxiety of having so much anxiety. It truly affects me every day when I wake up in the morning and realize that, nope that horrible feeling is still there! I don't even have to have a specific thought before that awful feeling in my stomach and chest appears. And everything just spirals around that constant fear. It compounds all of my other problems and makes each day an incredible challenge.
He saves those who are crushed in spirit.
I am so sorry that you are going through this right now. I wish I could give you some advice about the job and living situation, but I cannot provide any insight myself. What I can do is tell you that whenever I am in a situation like your's where I am suffering, I turn first to my faith in Christ. I spend time in prayer and the Word of God. It may seem counter-intuitive, but it is actually the best source of comfort, peace, joy, and wisdom and discernment. (Psalm 37, 91, 112, 121; Proverbs 1, Romans 8, and Philippians 4).
May God bless you and please know that I will be praying for you.
Kevin Engle