Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
Greetings all,
I am new to this site, but wanted to get some input. For the last 4 years I have been emersed in anxiety and worry. My ex wife has used my son as a pawn for that time. That little boy is my life and she knows it so uses him as a weapon. For example, she remarried (has now divorced that person). During that time she was coaching my son to call him and me daddy. So that he was daddy Jason and I was Daddy Rob. It has been like that until recently (I am sure teher is a reason for her being nice). So for 4 years I have been wondering whats next and worried for my son. Recenlty, I have started thinking that I am having a heart attack. I have a pain or sensation in my chest or arm and immediately fixate, which increases it and elevates my anxeity. I know rationally that if it were a heart attack that I have worried about for the last several months, it would have happened already. I went to the emergency clinic (last year and two weeks ago) and everything checked out. While I am in the grip of that anxeity my main thought is leaving my son. Not sure what to make of it all. its fustraing and scary. Thoughts, insight ro suggestions?
-
I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
-
Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
Ouchie to the yeowchie on that stress factor. That is mean business. Yay you for standing by your son, whatever stunt the Queen of Exes is pulling this week. This stress is even meaner for children than it is for the other adults involved. He needs you all the more for for the conflict.
I suggest you keep on making posts like this one to help you sort through the chaos, play by play, as it emerges. Writing ^it^ out while the chaos is still fresh and sharing within a safe, supportive environment can help allot.
Welcome aboard. Listening. . .
For what it's worth
I kinda like the name, "Daddy Rob." It has a ring to it.
Your ex is not the leading person here, it might help to see a family counselor and come up with a parenting plan that you both agree on. She should not be telling your son that he has more than one dad and should be working with you so that your son has quality time with each parent and you both agree on his upbringing.
Chest pain is a symptom of anxiety, but it is hard to tell the difference sometimes. You might try some relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, meditation and exercise. Therapy can help you detach your emotions from your ex and her issues and help you focus on spending quality time with your son.
I hope you find help and are able to be with you son. Wishing you peace.
Here are some links that may help you to understand what you are feeling. Please get some therapy if your not already, Don’t let anxiety eat you up. You need to be there for your little boy. Hugs.
https://www.psychologytools.com/resource/fight-or-flight-response/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/prescriptions-life/201709/7-ways-calm-your-worried-mind-and-reduce-anxiety
Here is something you will need to do every single day. Remind your self that you are responsible for what you say, do, react, and respond. You are NOT responsible for what anyone else says, does, reacts, and responds.
When you change your response to fit your better balance, it changes their response, not always for the better, so you have to continue to make adjustments until it gets better.
The purpose of this is to help you manage your well-being from a safe better balance, no matter whether you are in anxiety mode or in overwhelming emotion.
Keep a daily journal private. This will help you see the patterns of behavior and to make adjustments to improve.
When you have overwhelming emotion, stop, pause, and breathe. Find the calm. That will help you be able to think, react, and respond clearly.
Best wishes as you find your better balance.
Lean freely. Lean often. The load is easier when shared. Still not easy, but easier. We get by with a little help from our friends.
For what it's worth
Accepting that unpredictability is the only thing I can count on from some people helps me stay calmer in the face of the insanity. I call ^it^ granting them the power of the weather. When it rains, run for cover. When it bakes, mosey for shade. Etc., etc., through all the unpredictable nature of ^it^. It is what it is, whether I understand it or knot.