So ive been doing fairly well until recently. i dropped down how much and how many times a day in medication i was on that was creating more anxiety, but i recently started a couple new jobs something that is a trigger for me. so i started developing some old habits and boom i had my first call out of work from anxiety attack. Now the odd thing is now that im not working two jobs im having daily worry about having them at work. When i worked two jobs i never had them because i knew i always had my other job if this didn;t work out. But ive recently moved into my own apt alone for the first time and doing alot of self work and inventory. Any ways i started feeling geniunely ill from something i ate yesterday and started shaking bad becuase of thinking i was having a panic attack and so i called out from work then instead of the flight responce working i realized it wasn't panic attack that i was really not feeling well and this was creating the feeling of a panic attack. But im working on this new course a radical idea of staying with your anxiety and feeling it fully so i thought i would write about it since i just did a course thinking and feeling the sensations i have. ie. shaking, worry about future, knots, etc. fear im going to have more panic attacks. But ive slipped recently and instead of taking my medication as uusal ive taken it twice in one dose since it helps me at work more and im not sure if it's creating a neropatways to an old habit where if only felt ok at work if i took an increase in meds ie double dose. This probably sounds like rambling and obviously i realized it's a bad idea to do that.. im just trying to see what is truly bringing back anxiety when i was doing so well having no anxiety when i had two jobs but now im down to one. Thats the only thing i can think is that psycologically i know im dependent to not fuck up and have panic attacks now im down to relying on one income and  then boom i have a panic attack when i really wasn;t feeling well.