Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...

As news of the second wave begins presenting with discussion of continuing the marshal law indefinitely, my faith in humanity has grown weaker than atheist faith in God. I still do not fear the virus, but the masked bandits who stole my world are looking meaner by the cover-up. With all my outside coping mechanisms CFC (Closed For Corona), I have begun to fear the fragile thread of what little sanity life ever granted me is ready to snap.
The powers that be are blaming the current spread of violence on the go-to scapegoat of racism. I don't believe that any more than I believe my 3 young, heavily traumatized foster charges are being isolated for their own good. They are scheduled to resume swim lessons on June 22. I wish I hadn't told them because the masked bandits still have plenty of time to steal that hope from us. We have been through so much already. My confidence that we can handle more of these masked joys is non-existant. I am ready to implode.
Thoughts? Reality checks? Hope?
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
I like to sleep a lot, thats how I cope. Also have a few beers. Hope you feel better.
This week I wish I had your talent for sleeping and drinking away my life, Chris. Sorta. Have I noticed that folks endowed with that talent are the happiest maskers in Coronaville?
Addendum
Talking head therapy is not an option. The talking head court and social workers attached to the foster children are traumatic enough, thank you.
With all the media hype who knows what's really going on? Focus on your small world, the chickens, the farm, and your small family. Prayers and many hugs.
I believe these children are grieving the loss of their world far more than the recent loss of both parents.
Are the masked bandits safe yet? Can you stop abusing children and disabling their caregivers now?
For you, my heart aches. There is very little I can offer other than you'll make it through all this, for the littles.
You know different black people than I do. My black family and friends aren't buying the scapegoating any more than I am. We believe the racial industry is still profiting mightily by keeping us separated. Book, movie and rap sales alone are in the billions.
Resuming swim lessons will be equally good for me, as well, Mid, even though I am only taking them. Being marshal law isolated with all this has been even rougher than the loss of my beloved sons.
There is another 8 days before the lessons are to commence. There is plenty of time for the powers that be to shut down the hope. Optimism is precious hard to come by these days.
The good news is that my faith in the unseen powers is holding steady.
Prayers ongoing, especially for the littles.
Here's to finding and sharing hope and looking forward to reading about the swimming lessons!
Now to halt the growth of my own prejudice against anyone selling and/or wearing masks. . . Since reminded by the recent racial industry propaganda, I've been challenging myself to notice the racial identities of the maskers I encounter. It hasn't been going well. A mask is a mask is a mask. Triple your proper social distance, please. Have we found the great social equalizer, at last?
Works in progress. . .
Praying I will *get* to report on the swim lessons. Here's to hoping the powers that be will allow children to gather as children.
Sometimes I wish I could reach into the television and slap that guy who just categorized me (and you) into one of his groups of ism's or ist's convenient to his agenda of the day. No wonder anxiety and fear are so prevalent. God bless each of you giving your all to those dependent on you.
By the way, was Jesus black or white or did he not have a box?
The only official racial designator missing from my strictly personal family tree is pureblood. Can we add a box for "Heinz 57?" "Mongrel?" One of the most frustrating side effects of the racial industry is troubled children who can look at blood relatives and say, "You are not ______insert racial designator here______ enough to understand me." Way to depersonalize adolescent confusion, profit mongers.
Never mind. . . Drinking my mandatory daily cup of bleach now. . . Adding in marshal law masking and social distancing now. . .
Are we safe yet?