I'm sorry you are going through this. I to have been through dark periodds that seem as though they will never end but they do. .. eventually. What you describe sounds scary but I am sure you are not alone. We are all here to help and listen. Praying we all get through this

We all go through this period and it will pass if you need to talk im around lisa

summerbabe88, you can ask my wife about periods where I last out in anger...just verbally defensive, never abusive or physically hurtful, but when you are in the midst of a period of anxiety that is beleaguering you, and it just seems to hang on day-by-day, it is completely understandable that you would be angry. Sometimes, I just need space, so that I do not intimidate or hurt the ones I love. When I am focusing in on something to avoid the obsessive thought patterns, it angers me when others interrupt, or more often, just cannot relate to what I am dealing with whatsoever. You are not alone in this at all. The disassociative feeling for me occur as "spacey" feelings (when the body is kicking in to help relieve mental overload after long periods of mental strain), or as the frustration of knowing how I operate psychologically when I am functioning in health. Hang in there, and if you need to chat with someone, I am on almost daily in the evenings, just message. BTW, the sensation of the rubber band around your head is familiar...I phrased it to my family as a feeling that my scalp was "tight as a drum". You are in my prayers. Also, we are tripartite beings - what stresses the mind also stresses the body AND the spirit...I believe that the disassociative feeling is how our spirit responds to the anxiety over time (you will know, too, if your dreams are scary or confusing and leave you tired upon arising in the morning). It will pass, though...remind yourself you've been there before and that you made it through.

I have been going through this for a long time and could never figure out a way to calm down during these times. I have managed it a few times by doing things that require a lot of thinking... recently I started teaching myself the piano because it ocupies your mind when your trying to remember what key to press but you can use anything that works for you. Just pick something that will keep you busy if you can.

Sweetie, I am so sorry that you're going through all that! I've been there myself and it's just awful being consumed by anger like that. You're already making a great first step by reaching out like you are. For me I found that yoga was a god send. I found a great beginners yoga dvd on amazon for cheap and while yoga is great for physical benefits, it also is amazing for anxiety because while you're focusing all your energy on those crazy contortion maneuvers it is almost physically impossible to be upset or angry about anything. I also like to play some nature music, do some baking, go for a walk in the park. All that cliche stuff really does help! Best of luck, and don't hesitate to reach out! We'll all get through these tough times, and time really does heal.

www.tarabrach.com
mindfulness based meditation might help ease obsesssive thots.
you cud see a doc to ensure you are free of other conditions associated with anger/anxiety- BPD and bipolar.