This same statement can be made positive to help you see the other side of the coin.

Take time to write out positive words and do the same as you have done here.

Hope you find a way to be connected with you positive.

Hello Kala. Welcome to DS.

I am thrilled to hear that you don't want that kind of mental chatter in your head. I'd be far more worried about you if you *DID* want it.

Have you tried anything so far to change the tone?

When I started psychotherapy, my self-esteem was low enough to create that sort of mental chatter. Deafening levels of it. Rebuilding my self-esteem wasn't easy, but it was/is worth it. I still have to shush my inner critics from time to time.

The first step is the hardest. Joining this forum was a good step.

Welcome aboard. Hope you feel safe exploring remedies for that undesirable mental chatter here.

Our minds are very tricky and it’s hard to be on the right perspective sometimes. I feel this way about anxiety and it’s hard to understand why my own thoughts will cause me this negative chatter.
I do know the world is better with you in it, and it is possible to stop feeling this way everyday, In my case I reached out for help wherever I can get it, I have learned our minds can be changed for the better.
Because you are in this forum it shows you are strong enough to open up and seek help. I wish you the best on your journey, there’s better days ahead.

Negative obsessive thoughts like those are the worst. But hey, as someone who has dealt with similar stuff, I can honestly and truthfully say with so much passion that it gets better. It really does. It sucks in its moment of course. It sucks terribly. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. It's so nice you wrote in. Listen, trust me when I say you will be okay. I used to be that way too. So insecure, so self conscious, so lost. Right now, I'm struggling due to anxiety and depression regarding other things like work and school, but I've been there. Everyone here has been through something similar. We've all been through anxiety. But you can do this. Here's a list of helpful things.
1. Talking to a healthcare provider like a therapist or psychiatrist helps. More than you think.
2. Text in to this crisis line 741741. Write the word "HOME" then express what you're feeling. Someone will respond at whatever time you send it, although not always immediately. But the text line is open 24/7 with people awake whenever you're feeling in need of help
3. Do something you're passionate about. For me, I love makeup. It has proven to be therapeutic to me.
4. Meditation music. Close your eyes and imagine yourself far away from the pain and mess you feel you're in. Imagine pure happy things. You know, it's not impossible to get there. You can get there by asking for help and by trying. Dont give up. Dont give up because life seriously rewards you later in time. Dont lose faith or hope. I believe in you.

I appreciate all the comments. I’ve literally decided not to go to prom not only because of the fact I don’t have a date (because I’m horribly ugly, and I mean unphotogenic ugly, a “unique” face, AKA ugly) but I’m only comfortable around one of my friends and she’s probably gonna have a date and would wanna hang out with her other friends. In addition, I love the idea of reading up but I feel like I don’t fit fancy. Not necessarily because of my body, my body is actually okay despite the fact I’m literally flat chested, but I feel like my personality just doesn’t match “girl fancy dress up” (does that make sense? Even with that I don’t even think it’s my personality that doesn’t fit, I feel like it’s my insecurities telling me I’m not the type of girl to ever be called beautiful or pretty ever(which is true). But yeah, junior year, never been glanced at by a guy, nothing. Although I blame part of it on the fact I’m really bad at socializing so I avoid them. But in addition, I’m a dark skin black girl and I don’t need to look further than anything to see men (especially black men) belittling dark skin women for their looks. And even when a dark skin girl is praised, she’s like the pretty flower of the pack. So given that, I have little doubt that guys even find me remotely attractive. I mean you know you are ugly when you can’t even take a photo. Especially nowadays when virtually everyone can look good under the right lighting and angles. But what happens when you have no good angles? When your whole fade is just wrong? Sorry I’m ranting, I’ve just got a lot I wanna talk about.

never had a boy look at me in school either. Not that I’m ugly, I’m a good looking girl I was just the weird quiet girl no one wanted to be around. Literally had no friends in school ever.
I’m 29 now and still no guys. I had a few boyfriend in the last six years but no one good enough. I have high standards. It’s true what they say though that personality is better than looks. Your so young! You have plenty of time to meet someone. I’m almost 30 and I know there is time. Focus on being the best you you can be. Build yourself up and find some hobbies. I am a crafter and it is very fulfilling. Volunteer somewhere. Find something to give you purpose. I was you once. I’ve been through hell and back. I have bipolar and also borderline personality disorder as well as anxiety so I’m speaking from experience. Do you and don’t worry about other people.

I'm not going to let you talk like that. It's the person on the outside that counts, it's the person on the inside that counts. I graduated High School in 1985 I couldn't get a date at all. I remember this girl and she was not the prettiest. But she wanted to go to prom so very bad. She was heavy but that did not stop her from trying. You see, she has down syndrome. It boiled down to the last day and she still did not find a date. I had twisted and sprained my ankle so i had to leave classes early to get to my next class on time. On my way to my next class i saw this girl lying on the floor crying. I knew it was her. I walked up to her or limped up and got down on the floor next to her and told her I'll go with you to prom. She kept asking me question of why. And i kept telling her why not. In my High School we had students with special needs and they have there own prom. But she wanted nothing to do with it, she wanted to go to my prom.I pulled out all the stops. Lemo, Dinner, Champagne on the way to prom. When we arrived i can feel eyes. Her. People are looking. Me, i don't care. Prom was i think from 7:00PM to 11:00 PM. As other were pouring out we just sat and talked. And realized were the only ones left to leave. We realised we were the only ones left to leave and it was only 10;30. I asked the DJ to play a song to close a dream. Think positive thought and never let them go. There is someone who does not have a date, who is desperate.. Keep your eyes focused forward.

( Hope To Cope ) Scott

Thank you Scott. But I don’t see any way out of my situation. A full facial reconstruction to look different would be nice lol