Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
The dating sites were my last hope to find someone. I started in January. Six months plus and no serious dates. I feel more alone than before. As a kid I tried to never hurt anyone but I got hurt plenty. When someone criticized me for something I tried to change what was wrong. I had really long hair but no one else did so I got it cut. "Oh, you look so much better" they said. I wasn't big but I went on a starvation diet and lost so much weight that I was underweight. Oh, "you look so much better" they said. I worked and was open to everyone and tried to look as good as I could. Wore nice clothes. Oh, you "look good" they said.
Then Dad got sick and my life was put on hold but I still "looked good". I got really sick in 1999 but recovered and I "looked good", they said. When I worked in the store, I was told how nice and "pretty" I was. Yea, I still "looked good". Mom got hurt then sick. A man I cared about told me I was too fat to date. I began to wear down but still tried my best to help everyone I could and tried to "look good". Then my boss got pissy with me and I fell apart.
Lately I have tried to distract myself by meeting guys. The love of my life is gone and not answering any texts for over 2 weeks. That was the last straw. The ones texting now are in foreign lands or a thousand miles away. I invited one local to the chicken dinner today and he said he was still in quarantine. Good brush off there.
I keep wondering what I am doing wrong or what this force field I have around me that causes men to stay away??? I am open and respond to affection. Try to be honest without being sensative or too much. I have seen females who are so homely, I thought they were men! But they had someone! Usually a nice looking guy too.
So I am going to get a beauty shop hair cut Monday and going to the grief support Tuesday night. Even the idiot that took my lumber thought I was giving it away when I had my price on it. I can't seem to win. I can't let myself get careless. But I am slipping from reality.
I can't sleep either. 3 am and I am sitting her crying and so tired. I went to work yesterday and left the coffee pot on! Not a good thing. I am slipping and I have never been this down before. Oh LORD, Please help me out here. I need guidance. In JESUS name, Amen
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
You are beautiful, you are loved, and you are going to find what helps you to heal the hurt inside.
Go do things, take walks, plan a trip, and just be with yourself again.
I'll put in another vote for crying ^it^ out, wiping the tears and doing something special for the beautiful person you are, with or without the fashion statements. Just voting. ^It^ remains yours to sort.
Continued support while you find what is right for you.
But back to my point. If they aren’t texting you back, they aren’t worth your concern. If they are making excuses to be distant then they aren’t worth the emotional turmoil they are putting you through.
Work on you! Get a hobby (reading books, running, gym exercise, whatever makes you happy could be bdsm or orgies, doesn’t matter to anyone else as long as you are happy!
Once you are happy with yourself and your own life then find someone to share it with!
Something I wish I listened to when I had the chance.
If the people you have in your life do not make you happy make them the back burner or last priority. Your mental health should always be your first priority!
Maybe this is where the rubber meets the road in terms of letting all that pressure and angst go and just trying to stay present. Keep it simple.
Don’t know if you are a basketball fan but I am and I live in Milwaukee where the Bucks just won the championship. One of the Bucks players, Giannis Antetokounmpo, said the following during a press conference and I really believe it to be true:
“When you focus on the past, that's your ego. When I focus on the future, that's my pride. I try to focus in the moment, in the present. That's humility, that's being humble.”
I interpret the focus on the present and humility to mean that the thoughts about past and future are distractions; being present opens the door for contentment and peace, Not trying to get all new age-y here but I just think sometimes we have to strip it all away and remove those distractions of what was and what we think we should be in order to be our true selves.
You are ok. You are just finding your way.
Even more recently, I had someone return in my life (for what reason is know only to God) but I finally told her exactly how I felt about her. From the moment I laid eyes on her to still this very moment I am in love with her. I understand her heart and her soul, and felt that she had understood mine. In being completely vulnerable to her, more than I have ever been in my life, I found myself yet again being rejected. If I am being honest, I am still not over it and I am quickly losing hope. I pray to God that I can find someone who will stay and maybe even be my forever but I after so many people reject you I guess you really start to wonder what is so innately wrong with yourself.
I understand what you're going through because I am going through the same. Although it seems like everyone has it figured out, they do not. They're only showing you what they want you to see. If I can give you any insight its that YOU ARE NOT THE PROBLEM. You have been created in which God had intended and although so many people have hurt us both you cannot quit. God has promised that he will never challenge us with anything that we cannot handle and in times like this God has stated that He is only challenging us because He wants us to come closer. Those who receive hardship are being challenged by God and I implore you to keep being strong. There is NOTHING in this world that you cannot handle, and my friend, you are Perfect. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.