When you 'stop' the urge by distracting your hands, either through writing, playing with the gerbils, or doing some task, you break the pattern.

You are the only one who can break the pattern. No one else can.

Hi ChristianWhovian. Do you have a good sleep hygiene routine? It may sound corny but taking a hot shower or bath will help to relax you. A nice cup of cocoa or herbal tea may help lull you to sleep. Nice relaxing sounds or music may ease anxiety and tension.
Hair pulling is your body's way of managing anxiety so to reduce or eliminate pulling there has to be replacement behaviors and strategies. Being mindful of when triggers occur and using some sort of intervention.. fidgets, coloring books, stress balls. It may take a variety of things initially. You may even want to include your family in using cues because there were times when I wasnt aware I was mindlessly pulling.

I like to listen to my music while writing in Gallifreyan. Last night I was doing that but my sister turned on her music which stopped my music. We have Alexas and their all connected to each other.
Eating also helps me stop but I don't want to get fat.
Whenever my sister finds me pulling, she yells at me to stop. I get mad that she's yelling at me so I keep pulling to get to her. I know that's a bad thing to do.
When I'm on my computer, I'm typing so that stops me from pulling but since I stayed up so late, I got really depressed and grumpy and my mom blames my computer whenever I do that so she took it away for the day.
My friend keeps asking me to call her and she doesn't realize I'm really drained by our phonecall last week. I know. It was a week ago. But it was an hour long. She also sent me 38 polos on Marco Polo.

That sounds like a lot to sort though. I think the best advice or skill is learning to problem solve. Perhaps you can listen to music via your phone and headphones or headphones with your computer instead of Alexa. Ask your sister to give you a gentle reminder instead of yelling because screaming causes more stress and anxiety. Tell you friend that you're taking a break from phone calls as a form of self-love/care. And if you decide to call eventually then limit it to 15 to 20 minutes, not hour long conversations. Set boundaries.

That sounds like good advice. I'll try it.
I'm not allowed to take my phone or computer to my room unless I'm talking on the phone so I'll have to figure something out for that.

Find ways to distract your anger into action that works for you. Different activities that you can pick up and focus on when the usual ones are not available for whatever reason.

Do not let someone else's behavior decide your action towards yourself. You can do this!

I researched it, and it said - "commonly treated using a type of CBT called habit reversal training. This aims to help you replace a bad habit with something that's not harmful."

Probably should look into that therapist you were posting about going to see. You can start CBT, which stands for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. And therapy can also help with your other phobias and anxieties that you have posted about.

There are also a few medications that are supposed to calm the urge to pull.

I think you could ask your Mom to get you some help. A therapist and possibly medication.

Getting treatment for anxiety could really help make your life easier to manage.

Yes, what girl mentions about CBT is actually a positive successful treatment plan that requires you to put in the effort for it to help you find a better balance.

The Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) plan has homework assignments for you to complete in between the office visits (online or telephone if in person is not available).

That habit reversal training belongs to you. It's yours to make effective and positive and directed to improve your ability to manage anxiety within a normal range.

I struggled with hair pulling and also head picking when I was in high school. I saw a psychologist and was able to work through the behavior. One of the homework assignments I was given was to keep a ziplock bag in my pocket, and each time I pulled my hair out I was to collect it. Oddly enough this did help me see the quantity being pulled and mentally made me think about what I was doing enough to change the behavior. I also picked up crocheting and some fidget toys to help during times I would have a pulling session. Just like typing, spinning a fidget spinner keeps your hands busy but takes away the ability to pull. Maybe something similar may help you too… best wishes to you! You got this and you can learn to manage it! It just takes practice and time.