Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
I'm a victim of violent crimes, including sexual abuse by a doctor (when I was a teenager). Three yrs ago I was diagnosed with Autism. I have to admit I feel failed.... had the ASD had been diagnosed ten year earlier, 2 of the crimes I've had could have been prevented. I'd have got to know myself sooner and learned about who I was, and taken charge more.
I've had loads of therapy which helped a bit. I felt anger towards my attackers for many years.... got no justice as the police pick and choose what they deal with, and tend to take the abuser's side (if they're a doctor or teacher). It's frightening that there are predators working as teachers and doctors - not just men but women too, as I was abused by 2 men and 2 women.
Slowly I'm managing to become a more positive person; a therapist told me some awful stuff about the inside of an abuer's mind (and the abuser has absolutely nothing to envy, there's no running away from their poisonous mind), and I've done activities to help re-set my own mindset, and recently been working on forgiveness.
So far, because of the abuse, Autism and depression I've had, I have not attracted the right guys; I've had four relationships where I've been with someone who is either cowardly (dumps me by text, or just disappears when there's a disagreement), a sleaze bag, a manipulator, or a shouty person. I've now finally learned how to protect myself.
I was wondering if any of you have experienced similar to me (abuse/trauma, then PTSD, then gradually become happier), and you're now in a relationship with someone who really looks after you? My mind is now focusing on the positive at long last. I've accepted the abuse, the bullying from police, and focusing on me (rather than disgusting people who wrecked my life for years). I'm thinking about what I want, what I won't tolerate, what I need, while learning to devote time to myself for self-growth. We are what we think, so I have taken time each day to imagine how it would feel to be with someone special, where we'd go, spending time together.... basically getting myself onto a different level of thinking. Hopefully Mr. Right will walk into my life fairly soon? (I'm okay with being single and not desperate, but it's time that something changed for me and I hope to share my life with someone special.)
If any of you could give me a little reassurance that would be great.
Thanks
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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First, I hope everyone is doing well, and continuing to fight that good fight! Keep up the great work on yourselves; I'm rooting for all of you!So, I started doing therapy at the beginning of the year, when I was in my most depressed state, but with my therapist, I made big changes and steps in the right direction. But, over a month ago, she couldn't take my insurance anymore, and I had to stop...
The reassurance I'd rather offer is that healing happens and continued work on your own recovery from those deep wounds you suffered. Keep the focus on your own healing journey and trust the mystery. Love is like a butterfly. The harder you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you sit quietly and admire the meadow, it will come to sit softly on your shoulder.
What do you mean by "chump"?
I was sexually abused as a child and assaulted at 17. I was never angry at my attackers but rather myself, so forgiveness for me was easier on their end. It took me awhile not to hate myself for their actions but I got there.
I started dating my husband at 19. I had just decided to not focus on men as I needed to work on myself and before I knew it we found one another. He is a good man. Loving, kind, he makes me laugh. He's not always great at knowing what to say when I'm upset, but he holds me, helps me ride out my panic attacks, and listens. We've been together 6 years and have a baby boy.
You will find the one for you. I fully believe this stuff happens when you aren't looking or trying. I apologise if you aren't religious but I've learned that God knows what you need and when you need it. Just focus on you, keep healing and eventually your Mr. Right will come.
It's good that you realize the need for forgiveness in moving forward, it really is vital to overall health. Early on, I longed for someone to make me whole and fill in all the terrible losses and experiences I had growing up. I found the beginnings of healing by coming to the end of myself in realizing that I couldn't do it alone and cried out to Jesus to heal me and make me whole again. Once I surrendered my life and gave over all my hurts, my mistakes, my pain to the One who knew me and loves me more than anything, I found freedom and true love.
After laying it all down, I met the love of my life. However, old habits die hard, I didn't feel that I was worth of love, that I had to earn his love as well as I tried to make him be the one who was to "fix" all that was wrong within me. Through a lot of prayer and persistence I realized that no man could "fix" me, only God knew me well enough to do that and only He knew how to do that. Again, through a lot of prayer and letting my husband off the hook for being everything that I wasn't, I have grown and gotten down then gotten back up to try all over again. It is a process, you will have hard times, but never give up. Focus on your own healing and becoming whole before meeting another person to join you in life. Good luck my friend, it is a journey, but one totally worth taking.