Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
I know I haven't posted anything in a while, being that during the time being has been an amazing few weeks. As some may know, over a year ago I was sexually assaulted while away at school, it has been beyond hard to believe it has already been a whole year since that awful night. However, with the time being I am preparing myself getting ready to go forward with my case into a preliminary hearing in less than a month. But after these past few weeks things have become even more difficult, in the time of much needed close friends to have, I seem to have seen the true people behind who I thought were my "best friends".
A dear friend of mine of five plus years has been in a relationship for three of those years, which is amazing for them. I am truly happy for her and am glad to know that she is happy, however as time keeps moving forward I am feeling more as someone she only calls to vent to me with issues that arise between her boyfriend and herself. When it is a night that I am in need of just a female to call up for support and someone that is not family or my boyfriend, she was always my go to. It is even to the point of where I am not excited to invite her to come and visit anymore, all it seems she wants to go out to clubs and party on weekends, which used to be fun to me but now it seems to just be an every now and then kind of thing for me. When the time comes where I would enjoy going out for a night, it seems to be too much of an inconvience to her and her schedule. Now, it just seems even difficult for me to have a discussion with her without talking about the one thing on my mind this month.
Another friend who also happened to be my roommate during school, which was also the person that had helped me that night to the police station, has now basically dropped me (at least it feels) and no longer has time to make a phone call or even a text one day a week. When we both moved away from school, she moved states away and I stayed back, so I knew it would be difficult but I never imagined she would change so drastically.
Even though I may have just explained a lot when it might've just been easier to simply say I've lost my friends and it is hard coping in this time, I feel as though I may just be overdramatic at this time. All I am truly trying to get out of this post is, right now is one of the biggest key times to have many support systems by my side, the ones I thought would be there through it all have all someway somehow disappeared or changed. Even though I know I have the amazing support from my family back home and my amazing boyfriend, it's just not the same not having those female friends that I could call nearly anytime of the day and be able to cry to them, talk to them, or even just ask them for help.
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Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
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"don't be a hate hole" has been one of my recent mantras which seems to be escaping my mouth more and more often. it emerges when i am faced with the endless list of chores i would rather not deal with. insurance. head lice. bureaucracy. in-laws. the list goes on and on and on and on, ad infinitum.reality checks requested. am i making sense?"ever'thin they is but loving leaves a rust on your...
Sometimes, we think it is about us, when, they may have their own thing happening and knowing you are already stressed, decide it is better not to share.
Take a moment, step back, and consider how you want your well-being to improve. Then when you figure out how you want to respond, the conversation will change. The others' response will change as their usual response no longer fits.
You have not 'lost' any friends. You have discovered what everyone discovers when a traumatic event changes their thinking what happens to those relationships that are significant "help-call anytime, talk, cry, ask". Those relationships are often strained as the months pass.
If you can find a support group to attend, that will give you a positive outlet to express your feelings, expose your feelings about the changes, and help you find a positive balance now.
Instead of focusing on the friendships that have changed, focus on helping your self move to a better balance.
Best wishes.