Anxiety Support Group

Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...

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Family stress triggering anxiety

Ayet
Ayet

Hi all,


I've never posted here, but I am looking for coping mechanisms for dealing with or diffusing the anxiety brought on by family gatherings. The spring has a lot of family: birthday after birthday, Passover, Easter, Mother's Day, and so on. And while I feel so lucky to have a large, loving family, the reality is it gets really stressful dealing with all the relationships and interactions and other people's histories or dramas. This leaves me biting my nails and constantly on the verge of tears or grumpy and snapping at my partner, and it's not good for anyone. 



How do people let go of the family stuff and particiate in events without the emotional hangovers/anxiety rampup afterward?

tweety53
tweety53
I’m not saying this is the best way to deal with anything but I hate family gatherings . I just sit on the couch or in the corner and don’t really talk . If it gets too loud , I just excuse myself outside or to the bathroom
Ayet
Ayet
Haha I get wanting to do that, but unfortunately my family role has always been facilitating everyone else's comfort in the room. How did you let go of that and honor your own feelings?
shadowlady
shadowlady
Guess holidays are hard for most of us. Maybe reading emails or playing games on your phone could relieve some tension (that's usually what I do.
arfie
arfie
I carry therapy tools to family gatherings and take frequent therapy breaks during the gatherings to keep the anxieties, etc., from escalating. My therapy tools vary allot, but they might include meditation readers, grounding talismans, therapy workbooks, phone numbers of peer supporters, etc.

Allot of times the preventative measures help diminish the residuals, but I budget extra time for extra therapy work after the events, just in case. On the blessed occasions where the hangovers are light, I can always find some other use for the extra time I budgeted.
ellomalley
ellomalley
yeah thats hard i feel that way too sometimes. i try to engage with my family
i try to tune them out sometimes when they talk about drama or stuff i dont wanna hear about cuz i might fall asleep. thats ok, just be mindful its fine to feel that way, just try to be supportive but have boundaries and coping tools set up. :)
AllyS
AllyS
Family gatherings can definitely be a lot! Especially if you role has historically be 'facilitator'. I also come from a big gathering and I am able to stay calm through taking breaks, whether that is going to the bathroom or to an unoccupied room for just a few minutes.. having that time just to breathe a regroup has been really helpful! Also, making sure you have time to decompress after the party can be key as well.. :)
Good luck!
Ayet
Ayet
Breaks are a good idea, I'll try to do that more. Thanks everyone.
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