Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
Ok, so I don't even know where to post about my horrific job. Sorry if this is the wrong group, I am kind of new to this site, and this is only my 2nd post. (I prefer to leave encouraging comments for others). <3
Anyway. Nothing about where I work is "the bright side", so please don't tell me to look at it. There are a total of 11 employees who work at this place. (Me, my boss, and my co-workers). There is one bathroom with 1 toilet for females and one for men. Sometimes the whole upstairs smells like someone's shit. Someone was trying to teach me some of what he does today and said "You have to WORK your way up in this place." Okay, totally understandable. But no, not really. You have to step on others to get "up" at this place.
People there use me for my good energy. If they see I'm in a good mood, they'll come and try to bring me down (So they can get UP).
Here's the Extreme Paranoia part. I feel like there is mind-control there. They can read my exact thoughts and tell me exactly the words I was thinking. I have woken up in the morning and been struggling to get up to take a shower and get ready, and for a split second I SEE one of my co-workers and hear them say my name. No one believes me. No one understands, unless they work there or HAVE worked there. I won't say where it is or what kind of company. They might see this somehow.
I have felt like killing myself because of this job. It feels like jail. I have no windows to the outside world. Oh, and for the most part, everyone there has a friend they usually talk to / stick with. Everyone except me. Sometimes I go 8 hours without speaking to another human being. A co-worker called me Autistic once. Same one called me fat. I'm 5'2" and weight 130 lbs. OK CRAZY PERSON, not every woman has a body of a 12 year old. Fucking Cunt.
-
I did the dumbest thing today. I charged my earbuds, unplugged the block and put the block in my little bag instead of the earbuds. I wasn't happy about that when I got to the gym. What a dummy!
-
Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
Always make the effort at break times to ask people about their weekend, talk about yours. You have to put yourself out there to make friends. I banged into a guy in teh hallway at work the other day and said hello, asked if he was new? He'd been working here for 8 yrs.
Your fear will control how you interact. This person who thinks you're fat and autistic; you may be autistic, women are often not diagnosed. As to fat, fat is as fat does, but you're carrying one event of being called fat, and I would recommend letting that one event go.
Second, just because someone says something does NOT mean you have to accept it. You respond for your well-being. Your response changes the situation, as their usual response no longer fits.
What I did with a co-worker who made similar comments to me was tell them thank you for noticing and walked away smiling. Smile at everyone, say hello, take a moment like Bridgie mentions to speak kindly to people. It's what makes our anxiety work for us, using it and the energy it gives us to reach out.
Anxiety can turn into paranoia, and the results bring your thinking into a different cycle.
In working places such as this, it becomes a process to make it through doing the best we can in the moment for our skills, abilities, and knowledge to keep working.
Best wishes!