It is the expectations we sometimes have that "you should" be some kind of way, trusting God 100%, that is making you so anxious and upset. Our expectations make us crazy sometimes.

So give yourself a break, okay?

My suggestion is just ask God to be your best friend. Ask him to give you wisdom, courage, and strength to love him/her more. Don't beg him to do magical things for you (like a new job, or a new house). Just ask him for guidance and wisdom and it will come sooner or later. Sit quietly and listen in silence, no expectations, just calm and sending out love to the "lover of your soul".

Give him/her the label of "lover of your soul" which is a friendly label. When you think of God, see him/her as your best friend (not on the earth) and the one who loves your soul more than any other being.

total empathy, sammang. in my personal herstory, i don't believe i could have survived my childhood without absolute faith in my, "invisible friend." getting that faith into a building full of freshly showered humans was and remains a brutal challenge for me.

for what it's worth
i found the bible study/prayer groups far easier to handle. they are smaller groups with fewer fashion pressures.

Our relationship with God is such a unique, personal thing. And when we go to church there is this expectation put on us to feel a certain way. An expectation to “be told what to do and follow like sheeps “ this gives me anxiety too
It’s ok to be unique and to have the relationship with God that works for you
Your question though was how to take the pressure off and just let it be I think self- acceptance. It’s ok to be yourself. Your thoughts and feelings and relationships with God is important and valid I guess try to ignore the pressures to conform to others standards

I always struggled with Religion/Church, I always felt like they telling us the same scripture Over and over.

Of course I don't really understand it, I never went to Catholic school,

I've pieced thing's together over the year's, But, Always felt like Religion/Church was being forced on me. I do however, Believe In God, I believe, he is telling me everything will be ok, and everything will be explained to me When I get to heaven, And meet Jesus.

I agree on just accepting yourself, giving yourself permission to work it out for yourself to take some of the pressure.

Use the time in church to meditate, or just let your mind wander. You can think and feel however you want. We have free will and the ability to be independent thinkers. That’s not anti-god.

I use church to find some sort of peace. Yes, I don’t care what or how the others feel. It’s only about how I feel.
I just like going and feeling that I am in this place where I can just be at peace.

I have tried going to Church but I just can't get into it. I accidentally went to a Catholic Church in my town when I was going through a bad time with my OCD. The priest said something that stuck with me. He said that the Bible was not a historical book but rather, filled with stories. In 1999, a good friend of mine called me when I was bedridden awaiting back surgery. She had just gotten Sylvia Browne's book The Other Side and Back. She started reading parts of it. There is no Hell! I knew it! I bought the book and loved it. So I believe that our souls write our lives out and we come here to learn for God. Sylvia lets us know what a loving God we have. I recommend this book. God loves you, no matter what! Be yourself!

Thank you all so much I am going through so much in my head between panic attacks and anxiety and irrational thoughts that this was just adding to the overwhelm

I have a big faith in god I go to church every Sunday and I dress up for it and I go to a bible study once a week.

Yes I get anxiety where it feels unbearable but I find god does not hand us things we cannot handle.

God has blessed me with many good things in life mostly my husband and my children.