Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
The last few morning I've woken up feeling anxious. This morning I was finally able to accept, or maybe just put the obvious 2 and 2 together that it's probably related to the fact that my wife and daughter are going out of town (out of state?, out of region?) for a few days. It's nothing we haven't done before, which is probably why I was unable or unwilling to see the obvious. They are flying Southwest and with all the news about Southwest cancelling flights and having to consider that that might happen to them I noticed the faintest sense of relief when thinking their flight would be cancelled. That finally clued me in I am, in fact, anxious about them going. It's a totally normal feeling and a totally normal reaction to the situation, but, since I'm hyper-sensitive to any feeling of anxiousness, I guess I subconsicously went into denial and now that the cat is out of the bag I'm extra skittish and wary of the little beast.
So, this morning I'm working on accepting the anxious feelings... welcoming them in for a short stay, as it were. It's a hard lesson that negative feelings are as much a part, if not a bigger part, of life as the positive feelings. I can accept feeling happy. I can accept feeling numb. Feeling anxious or sad... those I still have resistance to and it makes the situation all the worse for it.
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
I still don't have clear contemporary words for ^it^ but this post sure is rattling those connections. Dunno. . . For now I'm plying radical acceptance and watching where the acceptance guides me.
Progress... slow, uncomfortable progress.
I'm open to new ways of expression how anxiety works. I remind myself it is NOT the enemy when I'm fighting the worse moments.
Here's to your success in moving through the moment and finding the way that works for you!
I believe my psycho snot knot on the acceptance that anxiety is a helper untangles a bit when I separate the anxiety from my survival instinct from my hyper-vigilance. The natural survival instinct is an amazing work of engineering which is, indeed, helpful when used as nature intended to avoid or get you through a life-threatening crisis.
By the time nature's design is perverted into hyper-vigilance it becomes a bit like the diffs between Einstein's hopes for clean, inexpensive electricity for all and the atrocities which exploded over Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
Progress is, indeed, slow and uncomfortable.
God, please grant me patience. NOW GODDAMMIT! ! !
That said, you're right in that anxiety here is an expression of concern for my family and, if I'm honest, for myself. They're traveling... my routine is disrupted... so there is concern. But I do believe that everyone and everything is going to be fine. Thanks for that perspective. It's a subtle shift, but it does help me take back some of the power in the situation.