Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
I feel like I've successfull addressed a large part of my anxiety, and give these suggestions in the hope it will help someone.
1. Separate anxiety from tasks Sometimes anxiety can be productive, worrying about a test prompts you to study. But too often anxiety can take over, frustrating your life. So in a calm moment, realize that you need to separate work from anxiety.
2. Physiological Part of this can be physiological so check about appropriate medication.
3. Self-improvement Work constructively towards self-improvement, since part of anxiety may be that you are not accomplishing as much in life as you hoped.
4. Don't expect immediate response You can look for a job and be unsuccessful at first. But if you keep doing sensible things, refining your resume, cultivating connections, getting feedback, researching companies, it will be successful.
5. Bias towards action Some ineffective people worry, while others take action. So concentrate on what action you can take to solve or address part of a problem.
6. Get feedback I have a very successful family member, worth more than a million before 30. He did reasonably well on tests in school (but got some C's) and was not outstanding, intelligent but no genius. One key to his success is feedback, he is able to constantly take and incorporate advice from people, not take offense, and improve whatever job he has.
7. Break up tasks You may have challenges, work on taking little steps to solve a problem.
8. Luck There is both bad and good luck in life but it tends to even out, and reward most in the long run. Yes, some lazy people will get promoted and bright ones be fired. Ultimately, books like Grit say hard work and a desire to succeed will translate into success. Watch a show like Shark Tank, the one thing that will disquality a person is a casualness towards his business, they want people motivated to succeed. So recognize that being motivated will help.
9. Get over bad luck I have several family members, two quite successful. One thing they have in common, both had difficulties at their job due to unreasonable people and were able to get over it. Someone else may take credit for work, you may have a difficult boss, or jealous co-worker, but you need to be able to stay the course. In both of their situation, the bad bosses or co-workers were ultimately fired but it took some time.
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Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
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"don't be a hate hole" has been one of my recent mantras which seems to be escaping my mouth more and more often. it emerges when i am faced with the endless list of chores i would rather not deal with. insurance. head lice. bureaucracy. in-laws. the list goes on and on and on and on, ad infinitum.reality checks requested. am i making sense?"ever'thin they is but loving leaves a rust on your...
Thank you for sharing.
#3 and #4 are what resonate with me the most.
3- Self-improvement can be so tough when you are "out of it mentally", but this can be accomplished in small baby steps at the very least. I didn't even consider that disappointment in my accomplishments was another layer to my anxiety. I stumbled upon this during therapy in the last couple of months. I am currently focused on controlling anxiety linked to chronic illness, but this is something I will inevitably have to address as time goes on. Mine stems from being raised in an environment with lofty expectations. Or at least in my mind. Not living up to what I "should have been", is something that weighs heavier on me than I ever could have imagined.
4- Patience. Man oh man. This is where I struggle. Now that I am 9 months in (to an illness that creates panicky symptoms), I have become better at not letting the anxiety take over and create panic attacks (this was also after a lot of hard work in therapy and reading some great books to cope). But still, not having a distinct diagnosis, Covid environment and the absolute disconnect I have experienced in my medical care, has made me so impatient and this is something I get demoralized with. Its easy for that to quickly turn to anxiety and then spiral out of control.
Thanks for sharing.
Easier said then done, but you want to 1) develop a system for identifying things that could have been done better, and work to implement these suggestions. Recognize that it does not make sense to keep looking at things that could have done better or different, everyone makes mistakes. Steve Jobs earned billions and changed the work but spent last days reflecting on not doing a better job as a parent.
"I am currently focused on controlling anxiety linked to ... being raised in an environment with lofty expectations." I think the first step is recognizing you Don't need to satisfy your parents, just yourself. Once you realize this is your life, it will take some of the pressure off. So dad is mad you didn't go to business school and instead have job as a mechanic, okay dad, I'm happy.
Sometimes it can be tough dealing with this but realize that you don't have to meet their expectations. We now have successful women who are a little heavy, boys who are happy but like other boys, chasing parent's happiness is sometimes self-defeating because, you have different skills and goals than they do.
Note the bible says honor, rather than obey your parents. That means you treat them with respect but do not have to do what they want.