Alzheimer's Disease Support Group
Alzheimer's disease (AD) is the most common cause of dementia and characterized by progressive cognitive deterioration with declining activities of daily living and neuropsychiatric symptoms or behavioral changes. An early symptom is memory loss (amnesia), usually manifesting as minor forgetfulness that becomes pronounced with illness progression, with relative...
Hi All!
I'm new to the Alzheimer's group, but I've been on the Caregivers group for a while. I take care of my 89 year-old grandmother. She was diagnosed with dementia a few years ago but since then a lot has changed and I now believe she has Alzheimer's. She is incontinent, forgets things within seconds of being told them, has anxiety issues, doesn't recognize our house, etc. She has been fairly manageable until recently, and it all seems to have gone to hell. She wanders at night, claims she doesn't know where her room is, accuses me of being mean or not feeding her. I can't communicate with her, because she either says, "I don't understand what you're saying" or she acts like i'm crazy. This applies with simple things, like suggesting it's time for a bath or bedtime. At the moment, she is wandering around the house complaining of a stomach ache, but everything I try to do to help (lie down on sofa, go to bed, take a bath, sit with hot water bottle) is dismissed. All she really wants to do is walk around in circles and complain. Times like these I just kind of give up and walk away from her. Does anyone have experiences like this? Suggestions? Advice?
I'm new to the Alzheimer's group, but I've been on the Caregivers group for a while. I take care of my 89 year-old grandmother. She was diagnosed with dementia a few years ago but since then a lot has changed and I now believe she has Alzheimer's. She is incontinent, forgets things within seconds of being told them, has anxiety issues, doesn't recognize our house, etc. She has been fairly manageable until recently, and it all seems to have gone to hell. She wanders at night, claims she doesn't know where her room is, accuses me of being mean or not feeding her. I can't communicate with her, because she either says, "I don't understand what you're saying" or she acts like i'm crazy. This applies with simple things, like suggesting it's time for a bath or bedtime. At the moment, she is wandering around the house complaining of a stomach ache, but everything I try to do to help (lie down on sofa, go to bed, take a bath, sit with hot water bottle) is dismissed. All she really wants to do is walk around in circles and complain. Times like these I just kind of give up and walk away from her. Does anyone have experiences like this? Suggestions? Advice?
Welcome to this site. ALthough no one wants to be here, I do hope that you will find some support from others on this hard journey.
It does sound like you need some extra hands and help.
Does your grandmother have a neurologist? If so, maybe time for a check in with that doc....
My husband was in an excellent Adult Day Health Program and it was a HUGE help...and I felt like I had people---which I badly needed-- on MY TEAM.
Have you tried calling the ALzheimer's Association in your area?
They have a LOT of INFORMATION...It is their forte I think.....and they have a 24 hour Helpline.....
Do you feel your grandmother is a wander risk with the door opening at night?
Do you have anyone living with you who can share this growing burden with you?
Have you tried a simple reward system for necessary behaviors?
Here' s hoping you get some help soon....
hugs....
Now it is time as has already been said to bring in some extra help so that you don't suffer the fate of so many of us, that is "burn-out."
I found the day programme extremely helpful. My husband didn't want to go at first which is very common but came to enjoy it. I found I picked up many helpful hints from the people caring for him.
Do search out help in your area and try to take care of yourself.
It's easier said than done!
When I read the book
The 36 Hour Day
I got lots of tips and suggestions on how to handle issues.
I'm glad you found this site, although we all know it's a place we wish we didn't have to be
hugs
Of course the nights were the worst. He was extremely restless. Flinging himself crossways on the bed and refusing to move. Wandering with and without his walker...mostly without although I have no idea how he managed. Non specific pain was another biggie. We found that a Tylenol made him very happy.
I hope for your grandmothers sake that her end is near. You should talk to her doctor about anything they can give her to calm her and keep her happy and comfortable. That is the real goal.
we are increasing the amount of help I have. we have two aides who each come once a week for five hours but we have asked the agency to add a third day. this week my grandmother started the local day center which is especially for people in her situation. it was very confusing for her and she was pretty cranky after the first day but it is needed for me and I think she will get used to going. today was her second day and was a lot better. I also have an aide who is going to do the occasional overnight. i don't always get a lot of sleep so i think that will be great for me. I have always tried to make my grandmother happy but I have come to realize that at this point she is not capable of showing appreciation, understanding how rough things are for the rest of the family, etc., so i have to do things that she might complain about but they may be necessary for the rest of the family, especially me as the caregiver. she gets confused at the center but she gets confused at home too.
we do have an appointment next week with the neuro-psychologist who originally diagnosed her with dementia. i'm hoping he can give us some more insight on the situation. we may need to get even more help in the house and if so, i think we may need to do so sooner rather than later.
thanks again for all of the help and kindness!