ALL MOODY BLUES Community Group
This group is for all people, no matter what disease, disorder, or life issue that causes you moody times and needs a little support or wants to give support. Be yourself, have fun meeting new people that care and understand you. RULES- show respect, no extra drama, no bashing, keep personal info confidential , and don't give advice [ if asked ok] . problems or...
Ever have one of those days when there is no words to describe how your feeling? It’s not mad,glad,or sad. Not lonely, depressed or happy to be alive. It’s Eh... it’s like being in limbo of all of them. All day I’ve been going from one mindless thing to another. Goal of the day was to fully vacuum my living room. My living room is in beyond need of serious cleaning. I have not been well so it’s been a couple months, and I have 3 cats that go in and out via cat door. I have told a couple people that was my plan for today, figuring that would help give me insensitive. Well guess not. It’s almost 5pm and I haven’t touched a thing. I’m seriously procrastinating!!! It’s gorgeous outside, and I’m not even going out. I care and I don’t care all at the same time. My husband is being very productive today on the remodeling of our kitchen, as well as having gone out to fill all the bird feeders. My big productivity was heating up leftovers for lunch and filing some paperwork. Been searching online for a new bed, and porcelain figurines. Some FB, but not overly interested in that either. Maybe my brain is taking a day off whether I want it to or not. 3 week’s ago I spent 6 days in the hospital with perforated diverticulitis. The heavy antibiotics they had me on, made me feel odd for up to a week after I got home. Still not back to normal comfort levels. Hate having to change my diet, and follow up appts that keep getting changed on me. That on top of my other doc follow up appts. I had 9 doc appointments in the past two weeks. Add that to the “mirage” of my basic life, and....? We have, Forest Gumps “I’m really tired, think I’d like to go home now.” Only I am home.
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check out that smoke ring. It tasted really good. I smothered it with Maulls BBQ sauce which is Local to St. Louis and one of the best I ever had.....
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I was recently separated from my wife of 33 years and it's complicated. Anyway I rented a room about 15 minutes away and I see my kids about once a week. I see the people who own the house I live in once in a while but other than that I stay in my room where I do my cooking, wash dishes in the shower, read, color, and sleep. I get out at least once a day. I grocery shop and I attend 2 meetings...
Have you looked into alternate ways of healing like.....going to a healer, for example? I don't know what your spiritual or religious beliefs are but to be honest, I have seen some amazing things happen to people who were like you in many ways.
I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
I asked Him last year, “I’ve been calling myself a Christian for many years, but now that I’m not following all the “rules” of a Christian, what do I call myself?” His reply was, “your a Godling”. I liked that. Makes me smile every time.
Thanks for your words and prayers
Be well
Vicki
I kinda wish DS was more active. It's not like it use to be, that's for sure.
How are you doing now?
God Bless
After hearing all that he said, and remembering past conversations, I had to come to the conclusion that, no, I can not stay with this man. Even if he wanted to continue counseling. The negative energy that pours out of him is becoming detrimental to my mental and physical health. So divorce is back on. Permanently.
As heart broken as I got, again, I managed to find the silver lining. Just this past week, in order to quiet my mind and sensory system while he’s been working on house remodeling/repairs, I temporarily moved into his brothers new retirement home. They won’t be moving in till next year. They still have to finish things up with their house in CA. The plan was for me to only be here a couple of weeks. Husband told me last night that there maybe a good chance I could just stay here till then, since most likely other family members won’t be wanting to use the house in the winter, and his brother was hoping he could find someone to stay at the house during that time anyway.
This will give me a place to stay, while house gets worked on and sold. I no longer will have to see him every, as a constant reminder, and I get to see if I can work through, practice, all the daily functions of life that I’ve been having trouble with for the past few years. I get to see, just how much of my new brain crap is permanent and how much of it I can retrain. While still having the safety net of not actually being totally on my own just yet.
I had a conversation about God with a guy the other day, when I went to see my husbands band play at a function. At first look, never would have thought this man, would even mention God let alone have a conversation about Him. He brought it up first, And soon All my faith, experience, strength and understandings of God came pouring out of me to this total stranger. He liked a lot of what I had to say, and told me I was an amazing woman having to deal with all that I have and still be going forward.
God was preparing me, reminding me of all that I have overcome, up to this point. Reminding me that He is always with me no matter what, and I will be ok.
By talking with that man, it did help me also. I was “listening “ to myself as I talked. Feeling the love and strength of God within me. I gained some of my own strength through that.
Thanks for checking in.
You’ll have to tell me how your doing