Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
so ive seen a few therapist in my 28 years of life and for the past 2 1/2 years ive had the same therapist. when we started off i was okay and let tell you she is a woman in her 50's and like a mother figure although she has no kids herself and my mom is emotionally un available so i naturally gravatate torwards older females. after a few visits she started endearing me calling me sweetie and baby and nice names and always hugging me and rubbing my back when id cry which was alot. for so long this went on and i got closer and closer to her and she got close to me too. at this point in time she doesnt endear me with "baby" and it upsets me because it made me feel good like i belonged although she calls me sweetie still so i know our connection is still there and since i lost my job she sees me for free. i expect her to fix all my problems and be the one to be there for me all the time and when shes not i throw a fit like a little kid and feel unloved. sometimes when i see her if she doesnt hug me or she alot of affection i feel like she doesnt care. now im borderline personality and bi polar so what insight can anyone give me esp about the name calling part? am i too attatched or something?
im a recovering alcoholic and only 2 days sober so very confused
im a recovering alcoholic and only 2 days sober so very confused
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check out that smoke ring. It tasted really good. I smothered it with Maulls BBQ sauce which is Local to St. Louis and one of the best I ever had.....
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I was recently separated from my wife of 33 years and it's complicated. Anyway I rented a room about 15 minutes away and I see my kids about once a week. I see the people who own the house I live in once in a while but other than that I stay in my room where I do my cooking, wash dishes in the shower, read, color, and sleep. I get out at least once a day. I grocery shop and I attend 2 meetings...
Actually, the closer I read your post, you have made her your surrogate mother. That is why you feel so upset when she does not give you the affection (hugging, pet names, etc) you want. Your therapist is attempting to get back to the role of health care professional instead of "Mom".
Try to focus on working through the issues you're there to see her for, instead of the bond you have developed...
I too see a therapist. I try to use them as a way to get myself better not to create a relationship. Friendships are not for therapy
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Fortunately, they gradually created boundaries, I can't really explain it but I sensed that they were distancing themselves in a good way so I could become more independent.
I find that I am codependent and the codependent support group helps me.
Please take care.
God Bless
It is perfectly understandable that you would become attached to your therapist but that sort of close relationship is not good for you. Your therapist probably realises this and is trying to get back to a more professional footing. It is bad for her too and she could get into trouble with her superiors for being unprofessional, although her heart is in the right place.
Keep sober, a day at a time and you will see big improvements. With sober therapy, you can work on those things that bother you and get more self-confident. Once you get to love yourself, you will not need to lean on other people. You could also explore the spiritual side of your life as a close contact with a god of your understanding will allow you to accept the things you cannot change, give you the courage to change the things you can and the wisdom to know the difference (Serenity Prayer).
Transference only redirects the feelings you may have missed as a child....my parents did the best they could butt were very neglectful, harsh and displayed incorrect coping skills which when I got sober I found didn't work and were a very tit for tat way of conducting your emotional life!! Id check out some Pia Melody, Claudia Black, Alice Miller or even some Louise Hay ,Bob Earll tapes and vids but a sober mind and body helped lead me to my truth and I became less likely once I knew it to make any one a surrogate... My therapist Patrice was 6'4" and a very full figured human being but helped me to see what I already had began to find out sober and that longevity showing up to see her gave me a safer place and room to grow as I continued to show up for my life and put a name on the discomfort even after soooobriety became a priority:))))
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Cq-Pu-kNhw