Please be easy on yourself. I kind of view sponsors as the good crutch (even if I haven't asked for one yet). And from what I've seen, they can guide you towards that independence, even if it isn't yet evident. All the work you put into the program is bringing you to that level of growth.

You're right, AdelynRene, I am working towards that independence. I certainly shouldn't be looking for trouble where there isn't any yet. But I will start trying to diversify my support system and focus on my personal growth more. Thanks.

I am finding that the more in touch with myself I become the more responsible I feel. Mindful meditation, breathing and walking can bring welcome relief to offset life’s lovely little stressors. The ‘be easy’ , or kind on yourself is so important. We all need to learn how to love ourselves more.

I think the more you do the steps, the less dependent you become on others. At least , that's what happened to me...

This is just a suggestion but try to avoid judging yourself and others but especially yourself. Be kind to yourself!

God Bless

I'm only 1 month & 1 week into this round of sobriety so it's easy to see my past failures so clearly. I'll keep doing the steps and the yoga and definitely try to avoid being so hard on myself. After all, I'm almost up to 40 days!

Girl, 40 days is pretty good. Don’t look back. Just look ahead. Keep adding on the days. You’ve got this!

The only person you can count on to get sober is yourself. Of course you need that support network and yes it’s important but be careful that you don’t become dependent solely on that support instead of finding a strength from within - when combined your strength and their support will be everything you need for longevity - ps begin to like the person in the mirror!

If all the steps represent a spoked wheel. Step One is the rim. Step Eleven is the hub. All others steps are the spokes. Without steps 1 and 11 you sobriety is not going anywhere.

So, step 1 and 11 are extremely important. Both these steps are daily steps. To answer your question, read step 3 and then do step 11,

I am in AA too, As I worked my way through the Steps I understood that no-one could get me sober or give me strength to overcome alcoholism, including myself. My belief is the steps are there to lead to a spiritual awakening and reliance on my Higher Power to take care of my sobriety if I live as He wants me to. That, for me, is spiritual strength. My sponsors were - and are - a guide, a helpful person to discuss recovery with.

As you say, too much reliance on another person can’t be good. We are human beings and it is part of our makeup to be fallible, never mind not available 24/7!

I appreciate the comments. I feel strong, but not so strong, at the same time. I believe I can maintain sobriety, and I'm blessed with my support system. I still feel like I would crumble without my sponsor; but I don't need to think of that because it isn't happening. By crumble, I mean emotionally... I WILL stay sober! I don't overly rely on the availability of my friends, just their occasional participation in my life. For 24/7 support, I rely on myself. I hope that part of me keeps getting stronger; I believe it will.

I understand that; feeling strong but not so strong. It’s because we realize that we aren’t unbreakable I think. But that’s ok. Means we are human like everyone else. And vulnerable to the same things. Finding our inner strength to stay sober is like our super power though. And that strength will take us where we need to go. Look where it’s already gotten us. To take responsibility for our actions. That’s amazing!!! I feel like it’s just the beginning too. You can do this. Ps @ pete if you get this. Your advice is wonderful. Thanks for your guidance.