Kluv, you are going to read all these replies tomorrow morning and you may be hungover and feeling like shit but don't shut us out because you may feel embarassed or ashamed. You're reaching out and we're here to help you...drunk or sober.

i agree with my buddy squiggy. just get back on board and give it (as my british friends say) another go. i would really hate to reread any of my postings from the not too distant past when i was doing my own research. xxx, devon

all i can say is when i was drunk i did alot of crying and drunk soul searching but thank God today i am sober. i will not judge you for being drunk thats not my job, but when you have sobered up please come back and we will be here. hugs to you. donna e

good morning all. it is 5 am, didn't get much sleep last nite, that is one of the things beer does to me.. i do not sleep well at all.. and yes i regret drinking last nite, i don't want to anymore.. as u can read in my journal i take sleep aids and took them last nite when i was about done drinking.. i did eat before i went to bed, probably why the hangover ain't so bad, but i also slept walked i guess cuz i woke remember putting germ-x in my mouth, but don't remember going to the bathroom to do it. all i can think is maybe i had a bad taste in my mouth and wanted to get rid of it.. heck i don't know.. thank GOD i didn't swallow it. i don't want to be a drunk and I have been doing really really good.. let's see, why did i drink last nite? what was the trigger.. it has been very stressful the last couple of weeks, my last day at work is tuesday, yesterday was the first friday in i don't know how long that i was home bfore 7. it was a warm spring day, hubby was drinking..
and even though i was drunk last nite when i started this post, my question was a real one that i still don't understand..
why sometimes drinking makes me feel so shamed and guilty and others it don't. I ain't gonna lie, i enjoyed myself last nite, but i do not want to get back in the habit of drinking alot.. i have so enjoyed being sober.
thank u all for ur support and comments and love for this stranger..

Klu,
Thank you for the honesty, I truly think guilt is natural when we put an expectation on ourselves and don't fullfill it. Try and stay honest with yourself. If you are not ready to completely quit then cut down but stick to that or you are just setting youself up for failure. If you cannot stick a limit you have set up for yourself you may really need to quit altogether. Not much help but thanks for returning. Hang in there.. ~thinking of you! lolo

I get that way too. Don't let people bash you for a mistake! I let people do that to me and they sent me into a whirlwind of depression. They don't care. But there are alot of people on here who do care. Keeps your head up and smile. Sometimes you need a breather, just not a drink.

There is no reason to beat yourself up. We all come here in whatever state we happen to be in. Some of us sober and some not. I'm happy that you're alive today and it's a new morning so make the most of it. Booze does weird things to people, you laugh, you cry, you go crazy. It's the nature of the drug. And also your state of mind when you're drinking. Don't let go of the times you've been sober. You had a slip, get back on board. Blessings and peace to you.

AA doesn't kick you out if you drank and went to a meeting(unless your disrubtive)You are clearly looking for help and you will find it here,drunk or not. we prefer that you come on before you drink...but you are not shunned by all of us.Today is a New DAY let it be the start of not drinking,booze brings us all down futher,than we think possible! good Luck!

hey i just wanted to say good morning to you and it is a new day as you have told me b 4 .
I still think you are doing good and eveytime you slip you learn a little more , have a good day

Hello People???This is a cry for help and she does need to be on this site.
Now let me start. Hello, my friend. I remember being drunk on the patio many times. Then getting in the car to go get more booze or go to the bar to see my friends. well, 5 DUI's later and no DL for 14 years and I am here now 4+ years sober and I will guess that you don't REALLY believe you're an alcoholic because you don't drink everyday and you're not living under a park bench. I was the best binge drinker in denial that I had alot of people fooled except myself. Wow what a concept. Fool everybody else and F*** me. Wow. Self desruction at it's best. For now, I would suggest, asI always do, one of the main things that helped me. Start to keep a "grateful" journal. Write what you did that day and then write 5 things you are grateful for. It seems hard at first but it might go something like this: grateful today for 1) my child (I assume that pic is of your beautiful daughter 2)this site 3) your husband??? 4) your home 5) LIFE. Just a thought. we'll talk again. Keep comn back! Much love, "C"

You haven't completely surrendered

Hi K, I'm not sure I have any solid answers, but I can relate to how you feel guilty sometimes and not at other times. For me the guilt is usually when I'm feeling bad to begin with. I'm a person that feels guilty over everthing. My guilt stems from depression not whether or not drinking is right or wrong. Every time I drink I know it's wrong because my body doesn't need it and it is harmful. This in mind I don't always feel guilty when I drink. The times I don't feel guilty I'm normally in a good mood to start with. From your post I read you haven't drank in two months prior and this might be why you didn't feel quilty. Maybe you felt you earned it? I have been there. I just know I won't get away guilt free for more than one day because if I were to drink a second day after being sober two months I would feel like I was headed into trouble. Pick yourself up and get back to those two months. Just because you drank does not mean those months have been wasted.

It seems a bit harsh & judgmental to discourage someone who's obviously reaching out to us for help. Just another reason for her to feel isolated & keep on drinking. Just saying.

i remember coming on here drunk your on here for a reason for help i agree with lolo36
i was often ok with drinking but only because i knew i could have more the next night and next and the next and so on all i used to think about was drink even when not drinking at the time my god then was drink my whole life sat in that bottle

Not to you Dan you ahve all the answers..............
Just bee cool & figure out what YOU WANT !!!!
IT'A YOUR CHOICE....
You are your own person and you are GREAT !!!!
=-Dave