Asking God, to remove self-pity, dishonesty, and self-seeking motives, is a miracle for me as an alcoholic.  I love to just sit and be rendered lazy by my "poor me" thoughts all the time.  My alcoholism knows if it can get me to think when self-pity is the driving force, I then might just do it so much it will force my body and my mind to seek a drink.  Being dishonest for me as an alcoholic is like a second language when not interested in maintaining recovery.  Rationalizing the reasoning behind the dishonesty I can do rather well too, and my alcoholism also likes it when it can do this because it gives ground to thoughts driven by pride, leading to me wanting to isolate.  My alcoholism knows if I isolate, it can then suggest a drink, or some sort of relief, that takes me away from being spiritual helping others.  The self-seeking portion of me considering my plan for the day is the trickest though.  Self-seeking is such a difficult concept to define if not caring to know exactly what "self" is in this instance.  Self, is the negative feelings, the abnormal fears, the shame, the guilt, the remorse, the hopeless reflection the ego concentrates on, so my body and mind can find some relief from reality.  If I am seeking to sustain my negative feelings possibly because I might feel justified or as if I want vindication for a harm someone else decided to do, I am motivated by negativity, which will be too exhausting for the long sighted plan going forward.  If I am not concerned with the ill fear, that comes from unattaching myself from a belief that God will and wants to help me, and has no room for fear in his plan to do so, I will be a victim of my self-created fears, that could erupt into a baseline of thoughts all reeking of delusion that nobody cares to hear, and are so moronic, no solution will be available for them except to acknowledge they are all lies my ego is creating so I can seek relief in the form of a drink or drug.  I have to remember that a mind, that has no influence from spiritually guided principles, for me personally as an alcoholic will without question produce a miserable experience mentally that will lead to incomprehensible demoralization.  Uncontrollable lies manufactured in my mind is another way to describe incomprehensible demoralization.  

I think now all I have to do is believe I am not god, and that God does and will have the power to allow my plans to be free of self-pity, dishonesty, and self-seeking motives.  Today I am wavering back and forth over a complaint that I have "too much to do", but without asking to have my defects removed that might create a negative analysis of it, I am after doing a step 11, now seeing I "get to do" all the things I am deciding to do, and if I were to do none of them, it would not be the end of the world, like my mind is asking me to believe it would be!  My problem centers in my mind, and I can either do the steps, and not complain, or I can not do the steps, and be such a pessimist, others will refuse to communicate with me for good reason.  

Hard work by doing the steps each and every day on both the big and little things in life, is such a rewarding commitment and major way to change.