I found that I wasn't a bad person, I just had a problem with alcohol. I also had a hard time looking at myself the mirror. ( I would stand sideways or to the side of the mirror).

Alcohol is a drug and even sold legally it is still a drug. I was addicted. Addicted to the way it made me feel, or rather not feel.

I tried quitting a million times only to fail every time. This time around I made a commitment to go to a meeting a day and somehow the urge to drink has been pushed aside since 2012.

The thing was I needed some support. I needed help identifying the issues I had that made me need to escape.

I will say a prayer for you and hope you find a freedom and a hope for a great life.

Hugs
1is2many

Hello Ros17,

You are very welcome to the DS forum.

When I stopped drinking, it was against my will as I didn’t really want to do it. Tomorrow, next week or after Christmas were always the times when I would do something about it. Eventually, it became clear that tomorrow would never come and that the time was NOW. Even though I hated the idea of not drinking, it all came down to two simple choices. I could keep drinking and face a horrible future, probably including an early death or I could stop - there was no in-between position.

Once I decided that I would have to stop, I learned a bit about alcoholism, largely through watching the guy at the link below and I came to accept that I could no longer drink safely. Having that acceptance, and with a lot of help from AA, it actually became almost easy to do what had been impossible before.

You too can do it but there will probably be hurdles along the way, including Christmas. However, once you make that decision to stop, you need never drink again, one day at a time. You owe it to yourself.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMC62Y_5dyE

I am 73 years old. I learned to live without alcohol here on DS.

Welcome to our little digital oasis Ros17! Glad you found us, and even happier for you and your life-changing decision. I'm not far from you, having six months sobriety under my belt and now living the happiest days I can remember. I will caution that as you emerge from the fog, it can be tough at times, and that's why you'll see a few of us suggest you consider the additional resources offered by AA. The support of like-minded individuals and a recovery program that truly works has made all the difference for me. Please stay in touch and wishing you the best in your recovery and new life!

This is wonderful. My first suggestion would be that if you have adult children you get them involved.

Alcohol is often a family problem. It often requires a family solution.

Congratulations on ending the excuses. The why wait for Christmas was awesome to read.

The beautiful thing about sobriety, as I see it, is that we are in it together whether you’re 16 or 76.

I found my sobriety in AA; it may or may not be for you.

Keep posting in here.

I hope your son is motivation enough to keep you sober. It was devastating to me having lost my own mom to liver sirosis, The guilt from her senseless loss, took many years to heal. When I went through treatment for my own addiction was when it came up so I was given emdr therapy which helped me deal with the trauma.

So when you feel like taking a drink, think of your son.

God Bless

It's never too late or too early. i hope your endeavors pan out. It's not an easy thing to do, but oh so worth it.
There's nothing i've gone through in my years of sobriety that made me say, "gee, I wish I'd gone through that drunk"......

I'm in your shoes, but 20 years behind you. It's now or never for me. I went out last night and got very intoxicated.

Hi Ros! My sister is 68 yrs old today. She has been sober for 1 1/2 yrs. It's never too late to stop. She loved her wine too and is divorced also. She has a wonderful new life now, is retired and is secretary of a meeting at her home group in AA. She loves her new life.

You can have a new life too. Try an AA mtg. It won't cost you anything. You might just be intrigued enough to listen to what folks are talking about. Best wishes, Dianna

Hello Ros:

You are in the right place. I was drinking two bottles of wine every night and heading towards making that three. I was drinking to escape miserable jobs and life in general. I was 54 and I stopped. I had a bad hip which needed replacement. One early spring night, right after Easter, I was lying in bed and I was out of wine and it was raining. I asked myself if it was really worth it to struggle out of bed and get somewhere to buy more alcohol. Somehow, I made it through the night, then the next and then the next. I guess my point is ... as you have probably heard a million times before ... it really IS "one day at a time." Yes, after about six weeks in, I had a craving but rode it out. I have sober now for going on four years. I don't miss alcohol one bit. I am so much healthier and have a clearer outlook on life. (Yes. I have those days where a drink would be nice, but I don't give in.) One thing I learned is that alcohol never makes anything better or go away. You may be lulled into comfort for a brief period of time but once the buzz wears off, everything seems 1000X worse. There is the guilt, crippling anxiety, wondering what you did/said while under the influence, etc., not to mention the physical feelings of shaking, thirst, nausea, etc. Trust me, you won't miss it one bit. I wish you the best of luck in getting sober -- no matter what path you choose for recovery. HUGS!!

how are you doing on sobriety??? Be sure to get some personal physical support... I attend a program called Celebrate Recovery. AA is good- my dad is 30+ years sober through AA- I am now 3 years complete abstinence of alcohol but can not do it on my own- so most important is getting that accountability team and a sponsor to talk out things with verse numbing and escaping with alcohol. I have four years of sobriety from using anything to numb or escape (food, sex, alcohol, reading etc...). praying for you... one day at a time :)