Great that you have found something that works for you and I wish you continued success with that.

Personally, I prefer to focus on the positives and what works rather than running down other methods. I found your essay to be shocking, one-sided and over the top and based on my own experience I would have to disagree with many of the points you have made about AA.

Alcoholism is a serious and often fatal condition so I hope that anyone who is struggling today will keep all options open as it is possible to recover.

I appreciate your post although I'm sure it will be met with negativity and will likely end up being "closed" as any post that seems to point out the down-side of AA ends up being abruptly ended (just to warn you).
PJ54 - We all know how serious alcoholism is and therefore it is important to be able to have a mature and candid look at what is being offered out there and people's perspective's on those choices. Although I may not feel as strongly as OP about the negative aspects of AA I did also find that it was not for me (I attended meetings for 3 months). I did find things that I liked about it, but in the end, it was not my path to take. I WANT to hear about other options and I don't think someone voicing their opinion on a support forum should be shot down and dismissed just because the majority may not agree with it. What happened to freedom of speech? We are all adults on here and if someone is going to claim to be led into the destructive path of continuing to drink just because someone points out why they dislike AA, they likely are looking for a good excuse to continue drinking.

I mean no disrespect. Just my 2 cents.
Jen

When I stopped passing judgements and let go of all the negativity is when I really began to heal!

God Bless!

Possessing judgement or having an objective opinion does not equal being negative and certainly does not mean you can not heal.
Again, JMHO.

Thanks for being so nice and understanding everyone, I appreciate this not disintegrating into cyberbullying. I too was helped by AA for a while and I think if it helps you that's absolutely great and you should go with it.

Thanks for reading my essay. I just wanted to share it because it was relevant, although I was worried about starting a fight.

Let's not fight. We're all here to get and stay sober. I wish everyone here the best and was not trying to hurt anyone's feelings or recovery, just cite my own experience within the bigger picture of all of us trying to get healthy.

Namaste

Sounds like you have it figured out. I always say if standing on your head or ( witchraft and marijuana ) work for you then good for you.
I don't agree but then again I'm just a drunk trying to be sober.

1is2many

Live and let live. Who am I to judge. Whatever works, its your recovery, not mine:)

I know a few people personally who attended AA and stopped, and stayed pretty happy in their own routines. Whatever works is grand...it's always there for those that need it, whether they're new or returning :)

A real desire to change and deal with life without artificial crutches...that's the common denominator I see and respect in other folks in Recovery. The paths we take and the lengths we go to might vary depending on need and preference.

As for cannabis use...I would never recommend it...believe there can be some unwanted complications for those with an addictive inclination. But as a confirmed slave to caffeine and nicotine I ain't qualified to judge another's crutches. Maybe when I get my angel wings I'll head on back and tell you all how I made it hehe :)

P

AL for me I do not care how anyone gets sober. I do not care when others use aggressive words to try and justify themselves.

However, I do care when someone generalises me which makes out I am a "leering felons" "There is a culture of boundary-less-ness where people are exploited" "Spilling your innermost secrets to a room full of low-lifes and criminals is not a safe situation" "AA covers it up.". When generalisations, like these, are used about me in conjunction of anything I find them offensive and discrimitive.

If using these types of terms is how you believe is an open and honest way to have meaningful discussion makes me shake my head.

Bag AA as much as like but do not generalise that I am a rapist, a thief, a scammer and a low life.

Gr8ful.

I am very happy you have found a way that works for you! I attend AA meetings regularly, but I don't find the group I attend to have much in common with the group you attended. I am fortunate to live where there is a very strong recovery community and plenty of meetings, and when I came here, I was new to the community. My alcohol and drug use was solitary, so I had no friends to change--I had no friends.

Yes, I have seen that within AA there are the same problems in any group of people, but we watch out for each other and address those problems within the group. I don't think AA says that it is the only way, and I think it is supportive of anything that helps a person live a life of sobriety. I have never heard that the Fourth Step can lead to a relapse, rather, I have been taught to delay the Fourth Step until a person is strong enough in sobriety to emerge even stronger from the Fourth Step. Amends that would threaten one's sobriety are amends that should not be made, or anyway not made YET, according to AA as I have learned it.

But again, the most important thing is that you are living, happy, joyous, and free!

I am glad that I quit without AA. I have gone to meetings and find them depressing. I cannot imagine living my life with AA as a part of it -- much of it is the antithesis of my beliefs and values.

I also think that criticism of AA 9and SMART and EFS) is healthy. Recovery methods will never improve if we only repeat the mantra "if it works for you great." While that is true for every individual, alcoholism and addiction is a huge problem. AA and other programs have a low success rate and we should be looking at the bad with the good if we ever want to fix this problem.

Bad typing on my part... I meant SMART Recovery and WFS -- Women for Sobriety, not EFS.

I read your comment and your article because, although I credit AA with my ability to stay sober for these past 19 years, I rarely go to meetings anymore, and I thought we might have a shared point of view. Instead I was both angered and disgusted by your essay.

I'm with gr8ful. Your sweeping generalization of AA members as a bunch of scumbag criminals is offensive to me and all the rest of us garden-variety drunks who found peace and sobriety in clean rooms with coffee, tea, and homemade cookies. What inner-city cesspool do you live in where AA meetings are all like the ones you describe?

I don't think you're looking for an honest discussion at all. I think you're a wannabe writer looking for internet clicks and heated arguments over your sensationalist post. Very sad, really, that someone needing help might come across your blather and decide it's more dangerous to try AA than to just keep on drinking.

Finally, you traded alcohol for pot and call yourself sober. Gee, first time I've heard that one. Truth is, you are still incapable of living without a chemical crutch. No wonder you never made it through the steps. You don't want what we have. And it's clear you don't anyone else to have it either.

I don't judge people, who identify they have a problem and they have a solution that works for them. Kudos.

As far as meetings being depressing. I went to the most amazing meeting this week. Birthdays. Two shorter timers that I know (1,5) yrs (I have 2), and then 12, 31 and 35.

Life has been pretty good for me in the program but I had one of those "I want what he has" moments at the meeting regarding the 12 yr old. He was being. His share was incredible and the outpouring of compliments and people have for him were amazing and inspiring.

The other two members were wheelchair bound. There's a reason why I reveal this. The person with 31 years said life and taken him through mental facilities and homelessness. He lives a good life now thanks to AA. He had the most amazing phrase to close, "my legs may not work any more, but thanks to AA, some days I can fly." That brought me to tears.

Little would I know the last person, with 35 years, also wheelchair bound wild blow the doors off of that share. He suffered a stroke several years ago, and his speech was unintelligible. He had already been in tears thanks to receiving his chip. But he shook his fist and screamed out, and cried - his passion and love for th program. There wasn't a dry eye in the room and there were a good 90-100 ppl there. I'm tearing up as I type this. It was so powerful. He happens to be the sponsor of the 12 year person.

People got up and hugged him and then they shared he wisdom and sayings he passed along, and how he helped so many people through. And here was laughter. Lots of laughter. He couldn't express or respond to the love people shared, but that was a miracle for me.

That was a defining moment for ME. The power was so strong, I couldn't wait to tell the 12 yr guy my first impression and how it was validated by the fellowship. And he thanked his sponsor. And I hugged him and we exchanged a tearful glance.

Some days it's depressing and some days the message doesn't apply to me but as long as someone gets the message they need, that day, to stay sober, I'm all in!

I work every day with folks who have histories of violence, criminal charges, past or present alcohol and drug use, mental health issues...just people at the end of the day with human emotions and human problems.

They don't scare me, I feel no better or worse than them and I don't feel my employer (or anyone else) has some duty to 'protect me' from them...

As for AA...kinda reminds me how in early days I was convinced everybody else had been in and out of prison, slept rough, scammed and injured the folks around them. As I've gone on in sobriety something really weird has happened...I see many of the same folks and their stories have become less dramatic...they seem less scary, their pasts less murky...and little old me has become less lilly white than I used to be. ..who knows how that happened hehe :)

https://youtube.com/watch?v=Erthun0Pauc

P