Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
So my husband is an alcoholic. For a very long time I wondered if he really fit the model of an alcoholic because i often compared him to my father who was the epitome of an alcoholic and I thought was very different. But I have come to the conclusion that yes he is definately a drunk. Perhaps not as crazy as my dad but nonetheless very ill in his own way.
My husband tries to stop drinking and will succeed for a week or two while he gets through the withdrawal symptoms. But shortly after will pick up again. It starts slow to where I cant even tell hes drinking but eventually I will catch on. He says he has to drink to calm the shakes. I realize that he has a physiological addiction if he has shakes. But to be honest I dont see those shakes to be so apparent. But he claims he has shakes. Of course I get extremely disappointed by his behavior but somehow the Lord gives me the understanding and compassion I need to continue loving and supporting my husband. I realize he is ill and I realize that he has a hell of a battle to fight. Nevertheless I have such a difficult time understanding how difficult it is to just let it go. I thought the withdrawals were the worst part? So if hes better after a week or two, why go back? What compels him to drink again? I just dont get it.
So I ask you guys that have recovered. I know that first of all its up to him to want to stop. He tells me that he tries harder than what i can imagine to stop however he fails all the time. I say to him that he doesnt try hard enough because if he really wanted to sober up he would go to rehab or attend counseling or do something more than what he is doing. OF course he argues that hes done all of that and that it doesnt work. So then, what is left as a treatment option? Has anyone tried acupuncture or herbal remedies to stop? Is there some tea I can give him to reduce cravings? How about hypnosis? Any suggestions is truly appreciated!
My husband tries to stop drinking and will succeed for a week or two while he gets through the withdrawal symptoms. But shortly after will pick up again. It starts slow to where I cant even tell hes drinking but eventually I will catch on. He says he has to drink to calm the shakes. I realize that he has a physiological addiction if he has shakes. But to be honest I dont see those shakes to be so apparent. But he claims he has shakes. Of course I get extremely disappointed by his behavior but somehow the Lord gives me the understanding and compassion I need to continue loving and supporting my husband. I realize he is ill and I realize that he has a hell of a battle to fight. Nevertheless I have such a difficult time understanding how difficult it is to just let it go. I thought the withdrawals were the worst part? So if hes better after a week or two, why go back? What compels him to drink again? I just dont get it.
So I ask you guys that have recovered. I know that first of all its up to him to want to stop. He tells me that he tries harder than what i can imagine to stop however he fails all the time. I say to him that he doesnt try hard enough because if he really wanted to sober up he would go to rehab or attend counseling or do something more than what he is doing. OF course he argues that hes done all of that and that it doesnt work. So then, what is left as a treatment option? Has anyone tried acupuncture or herbal remedies to stop? Is there some tea I can give him to reduce cravings? How about hypnosis? Any suggestions is truly appreciated!
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check out that smoke ring. It tasted really good. I smothered it with Maulls BBQ sauce which is Local to St. Louis and one of the best I ever had.....
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I was recently separated from my wife of 33 years and it's complicated. Anyway I rented a room about 15 minutes away and I see my kids about once a week. I see the people who own the house I live in once in a while but other than that I stay in my room where I do my cooking, wash dishes in the shower, read, color, and sleep. I get out at least once a day. I grocery shop and I attend 2 meetings...
I often wonder if I should involve his sons. One of his sons is 16 and the other is 23. They both live apart from us and have been sheltered from their fathers alcoholism. In fact my husband makes it a point to not drink in front of them. He doesnt want his sons to know that side of him. Im sure that his sons are aware of it because there have been times hes been hungover and Im sure they can put two and two together. In fact just 1 month ago my husband had a seizure while working outside with his oldest son. I thought that this time for sure he would stop but nope it didnt stop him.
I tell him that Im going to call his sons when hes acting up so they can see their father and confront the issue but whenever I get to that point I just cant go thru with it because I feel its so unfair to burden his sons with their fathers problem. They are older now and I guess they should be able to handle the situation better than when they were kids but I just dont know if im doing right by allowing them to see him in that state. What do you think? You think I should let his kids in? Do you think that will make a difference? His boys are his world and he tries so hard to be an example for them in so many ways. My husband apart from his drinking is amazing father. He is the most loving, compassionate, and involved father I know. The boys adore him but they dont know his secret.
I use DS to remind me that I am an Alcoholic. I have some god friends in DS. We help each other.
It is indeed scary to think about the work you have to do in recovery. But this is where support groups can help. No one likes to be reminded or feel the pain and hurt. But it has to be done in order to get to the root of why you drink. Like they say, drinking is only a band aid for much deeper issues.
I used to be just like your husband where I would drink then quit for about three weeks, enough time to recover from feeling sick, then be back at it again. Usually my sober times when things were going fine. But the body becomes dependent on the alcohol, it begins to crave the drink, the feeling and sadly enough the chaos that goes along with it. I finally just got tired of being sick from hangovers and living my life in shame and regret. It was either dying, endangering someone else or going to jail. I chose a path of spirituality to help me get through the beginning of recovery. I still rely on my faith to be sober. I attend a local support group and now dealing with my issues. I can say my life has been set free and it is all up to me to make a brand new start each day. I know your husband can do this too.
Quit enabling. And there is a wives of alcoholics section you might get some support from here on DS
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God Bless!
To stop drinking, the first thing you need is a medically sponsored detox. The withdrawals can be fatal and are dangerous through alone. Next, a long-term outpatient rehab was what I did and it really helped. Look for something with a group therapy element. AA meetings can help but they are not the only path and may be alienating for some.
Another things that I have found helps me an incredibly lot to stay sober and has not been mentioned yet is cannabis harm reduction. I smoke weed instead of drinking and it completely eliminates any urge to drink while giving me a similar sense of release. if you live in a state where medical marijuana is legal and would rather be married to a pothead than a drunk it's something to consider. It is a lot more chill than alcohol and is a little-talked about but highly effective cure for alcoholism.
Hope this helps.